Kidnapped
by Shadow Jaganshi
Summary: Shadow and Eclipse are kidnapped in the bright of day by a complete and total stranger Shadow kindly allows into her house without question while the tantei are on a mission. HieixOC KuramaxOC
1. Don't Talk to Strangers

**(August 7, 2005)** Woohoo! New story everyone! Just so you know, I started writing this on July 9th. I'm almost done with it. I'll probably finish it tomorrow. August 8th. So, about a month. YIPPEE FOR SHORT STORIES! What a relief. My goal in reviews for this story is considerably less than the last story. Maybe 200? I think two hundred is a lot to ask on a five- of six-chapter story...  
Anyways, you're probably all gonna want to murder me after this story... XD YAY DEATH!

* * *

**CHAPTER ONE  
**Lesson One: Don't Talk To Strangers

It was early in the morning and the Reikai Tantei had once again been summoned to protect Ningenkai from some demon threat that was most likely weak and unthreatening. They were all bitchy from being dragged out of bed at some "ungodly hour of the morning" to quote Yusuke. And this tired, moody feeling was amplified by the fact that they were terribly lost--in a corn field of all places.

"I think we're going in circles," Kuwabara announced.

"Hn..." Hiei muttered from the back of the group. "Why a damn corn field?"

"If we keep going straight, we'll get out of here sooner or later," Kurama told them. "I'm sure we're almost out."

"Shut up, Kurama. We've been walking for half an hour in here. You said that twenty minutes ago," Yusuke snapped.

"Well I'm so sorry for trying to be optimistic. I could complain, like the rest of you, and we could all sulk around in the mud and corn and be miserable and pathetic! Would you like that?"

"You need to get laid," Yusuke said randomly. Kurama frowned at him.

"What makes you say that?"

"I told you to shut up and you flew off the handle at me."

"Maybe I'm just tired of your complaining. You've been complaining since you showed up at Reikai."

"Can't you like, ask the plants how to get out of here?"

"It's that way, Yusuke," Kurama snapped, pointing straight ahead. "Keep going straight." He fell back to walk with Hiei, way behind the others. His shoulders slumped as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. "This sucks."

"No kidding."

"I bet Eclipse and Shadow went back to sleep."

"I want to go back to sleep."

"Me too. With Eclipse."

Hiei sighed. "I think I should quit being Koenma's lackey. Why the hell does he need all four of us for a few low class demons!"

"I bet he just wants to get us away from our girlfriends."

"I bet he's jealous."

"I bet he is. Unless..." Kurama snickered. Hiei looked at him.

"What?"

"Botan."

Hiei chuckled. Yusuke and Kuwabara gave them quizzical looks.

"What the heck are you guys talking about back there!"

"Nothing," they replied simultaneously.

They walked in silence for another five minutes.

"Hiei, can't you just burn down all this damn corn!" Yusuke whined.

"You want to pay the farmer for all of it when we're the only things left standing in several acres of ashes?" Kurama asked.

"Hiei, can't you just find the way out of here with your Jagan!" Yusuke whined, glaring at Kurama.

"No," he replied.

"Why NOT?"

"One, because you want me to. Two, because I'm using it for something else."

"You are not! Can't you multitask?"

Hiei rolled his eyes.

"What are you using it for! Spying on your _girlfriend?_"

"No. _Checking in_ on my _girlfriend_," he replied.

"Well what's she _doing_, then?"

"None of _your_ business."

"Well if you'd rather use your Jagan to watch Shadow, you could at least fill us in on her activities, y'know? That way you're being useful."

"Why, by telling you all what my girlfriend does when nobody else is home?"

Yusuke crossed his arms. "She doesn't know you're watching her, does she?"

"Nope."

"You lecher! Is she in the shower!"

"No."

"Yes she is."

"No she's not. She's asleep."

"You have no way to prove that."

"No. I don't. Now stop walking backwards. You're about as useful walking backwards while distracted as Kuwabara is while walking forwards and concentrating."

"And God knows that's hardly useful," Yusuke replied, turning around.

"Guys! Why do you always make fun of me like that!" Kuwabara whined.

"Because you're easy to make fun of," Hiei retorted.

"Take it as a compliment, Kuwabara!" Yusuke said. "Everyone has their place in the group. I'm the strong, independent, jackass of a leader. Hiei's the pissy little fire demon with a bad attitude and a girlfriend who's even more annoying than he is. Kurama's the smart one, with the quick mind and the flowers. And you... You're the dumb one, with the honor code, the ugly face, and the overload of emotions who is easy to make fun of."

Hiei snickered.

"That is awful mean," Kurama chided.

"Thank you, Kurama!" Kuwabara said happily.

Hiei silenced suddenly. "I think we found our low-class demons."

"What?"

He pointed. Everyone looked and sure enough, there stood about five demons. They were ugly, and taller than the corn, and they hadn't bothered to be gentle about getting through the field. Nope. They'd plowed over all the corn.

"The _real_ source of crop circles," Yusuke joked.

"They're quite ugly, aren't they?" Hiei added, his right hand twitching.

"Koenma dragged us out of bed for _these guys?_" Kuwabara complained. "They couldn't hurt a _kitten!_"

"Oh well. It's something to do," Hiei said, shrugging.

The group of low-class demons were looking rather pissed, and, tired of being ignored and laughed at, lunged at the tantei.

_**

* * *

**_

Shadow, meanwhile, was sleeping, just like Hiei had said. Eclipse, who'd been dropped off at the fire demon's house by Kurama, was also asleep.

They were awoken rather rudely by the doorbell.

"HEY! Remember me!" it asked loudly. Shadow sat bolt upright on the couch, eyes wide. She looked around. "Me! The doorbell! I've just been sitting here gathering dust. Nobody ever uses me anymore... They all use the _new_ one... I can't imagine why you would have installed that one anyways, when I work perfectly fine..."

"Because you're an annoying jackass. You woke me up, you know," Shadow said tiredly, yawning and wiping her eyes.

"Well I'm so sorry," the doorbell said sarcastically. Eclipse was awake now, and looking confused and horrified.

"Shadow, are you hearing a bodiless voice from the heavens too!"

"... No."

"Look! Even now I'm being ignored!" the doorbell cried. "Anyways, I figured I'd tell you, even though you hate me an' all, there's a guy outside on the porch who wants your attention."

"Who is he?" Shadow asked.

"I'm just a DOORBELL! I'm not your _slave_. Ask him your_self!_"

And with that, the doorbell silenced. Shadow was wearing very little, and knew answering the door in socks, short shorts, and a bra would be very stupid.

So she did it anyways.

The door opened to a complete stranger. He was fairly young, attractive, and toned. His eyes widened considerably when they fell on Shadow's severe lack of clothes.

"Can I help you?" she asked.

"I-I was just wondering if I could bother you for a cup of tea."

Shadow looked at him like he was nuts. "You make a habit of going to strangers' doors and asking them to fix you a cup of tea?"

"I thought Japan was a courteous country."

"Oh, the country may be courteous, but I'm not. I don't think I have any tea, but you can come in anyways, cuz you're cute. I'm sure I can find something for you."

"Oh. Thank you!" the guy said happily. Shadow opened the door for him and he came in. She settled him at the dining room table, went into the kitchen, and dug up some tea. While the water was boiling, she went up to her room and changed her clothes. She came back down to the dining room and found Eclipse sitting across the table from the guy, staring at him blankly.

"Ignore her, she's a blockhead."

Eclipse grabbed the nearest inanimate object and flung it at Shadow's head. The potted plant shattered against the wall, spilling dirt and the sickly little dead shriveled plant onto the floor.

The tea was ready shortly, and Shadow poured the stranger, herself, and Eclipse cups full. They sat down at the dining room table and slowly sipped at it.

"So what's your name?" Shadow asked.

"Me? Ryosei. What about yourselves?"

"Shadow."

"Eclipse."

He smiled. "The tea is wonderful, Shadow-san."

"Why thank you."

When he'd finished his cup, he stood. "I'm afraid I must ask you both to come with me."

"Wha-?"

Ryosei pulled out a gun. Shadow's face fell. "Oh shit."

"Come on. Both of you. And don't think you can overpower me because you're half demons. So am I."

"Damn. Wait, how'd you know that!"

"I have my sources."

"You don't want to kidnap me, though! I, uh... I'm obsessed with pink bunnies!"

"I doubt it," the guy said, jabbing her in the back with the gun. "Go."

"I have bad breath!"

"Mouthwash." He grabbed Eclipse's arm and pulled her along too.

"I have an ingrown toenail!"

"So?"

"I'm a hideous toad!"

"Yeah, right."

"My sister's prettier!"

"I don't care about your looks."

"Well, um, my great aunt kissed a frog and turned into a rich old Queen of France!"

"We're in Japan. And France doesn't have a Queen."

"Yes it does!"

"No it doesn't."

"Screw you! You still don't want to kidnap me!"

"Shadow, where the hell is your damn dog!" Eclipse snapped.

"She was with Karasu! Hey! I have gangrene! Can I go now?"

"Is that contageous?"

"I have red eyes!"

"So what? Mine are silver."

"Yours are pretty."

"_Shadow!_"

"Sorry. **WAIT**!"

The guy stopped halfway through the yard. Shadow turned around victoriously.

"You can't kidnap me, because my cousin is a winged llama from HELL!" She put her hands on her hips and smirked. The gun pressed against her chest.

"**Go.**"

"Um, um, yeah, well, last Tuesday, I got bit by a poisonous snake! And, and--Yeah! And now it's just now starting to take effect on me! Gag! Hack! Choke!" She gripped her throat like she was suffocating. The gun pressed against her forehead.

"Shut up. Turn around. And walk to the van."

Shadow's eyes widened and got watery. She turned and trudged towards the van parked on the street. Once there, the guy pushed her and Eclipse both up against it and frisked them.

"Oh, I bet you're likin' _that!_"

He pressed against her back and hissed in her ear, "Shut up. I have permission to do whatever I need to get you to our destination. And if that means I'm gonna have to knock you unconscious so you'll shut up, I will."

Shadow swallowed nervously. The guy's hands trailed up her arms gently, then suddenly gripped her wrists and pulled them down behind her back harshly, pushing her forward at the same time so the side of her face smacked into the back of the van. "Ow!"

Something strong and sticky was wrapped around her wrists several times, then Eclipse got the same treatment, minus the threats, since she'd been an innocent little child the entire time and didn't complain. She, unlike Shadow, seemed to have a small hint of common sense.

"Get in the van," the guy said, opening the doors.

"I have arthritis!" Shadow snapped angrily. Duct tape was smacked over her mouth, and the man picked her up and tossed her into the back of the van. Eclipse got duct tape on her mouth and tossed into the van as well. The doors shut, pitching them into pure darkness.

_**

* * *

**_

The Reikai Tantei were having some different problems.

The five low-class demons had been defeated easily, and now about fifty more had bubbled up out of nowhere and were totally wreaking havoc.

"They're not even targetting us!" Kuwabara cried. "They're destroying the field!"

"Who cares? Take 'em out!" Yusuke snapped, punching yet another one.

"They're like pixies," Kurama muttered. Hiei landed next to him after having slashed another one in half.

"Where the hell are they all coming from!"

"THAT'S IT! I'M USING MY SHOTGUN!" Yusuke shouted, sounding very pissed. Everyone lunged out of the way as he let loose the dozens of small ki blasts. Kurama and Hiei cut down the few pixies that remained after his wide-range blast, then looked around.

"...Well this is certainly not going to look inconspicuous," Yusuke stated.

The field was burning, and a lot of corn stalks had been trampled or torn up from the ground entirely.

"Good thing the farmhouse is nowhere near here," he added. "Now... to get _out_ of the corn field."

There was a collective groan of misery.

_**

* * *

**_

Shadow and Eclipse spent at least an hour in the van. Shadow had already tried to burn off their bindings, but they were apparently warded.

Warded duct tape. The ultimate weapon.

Finally, the vehicle came to a stop. Shadow's eyes opened, and she looked towards the doors. The lovely darkness disintigrated painfully into daylight.

It took their eyes a moment to adjust, and by then, they were dragged out of the van by Ryosei and blindfolded before they could get any sort of bearings other than 'Hey look! Trees!'

They each felt a hand on their arm and were steered along on either side of the guy as they walked. And walked. For like, twenty minutes. It was annoying Shadow very, very much that she couldn't see, move her arms, or worst of all, talk.

Both girls noticed when the scenery changed. There were no longer sticks breaking under their feet or tall grass swishing by their ankles, but instead an echo every time their boots struck the ground. Neither had heard a door open, and they hadn't paused to open one, which was confusing to them as to how they'd gotten inside this place... But it didn't matter.

"Stairs," Ryosei said, pulling them both to a stop. "Down. Spiralling. Wide. Ready?"

Shadow let out a low growl, glaring at him through the blindfold. She took one step... and fell.

By the muffled screams and accompanying thuds, she assumed Eclipse had met the same misfortune. She slammed into solid ground some time later, wincing as sure enough, Eclipse landed on top of her. They both groaned. Hurried footsteps warned them of their captor's approach.

"Are you both alright?" he asked. Eclipse's blindfold had been conveniently nudged out of place as she fell, and with one eye, she glanced around, taking in their surroundings quickly before the hanyou boy readjusted it to blind her again. She sighed.

Both of them were pulled to their feet and led down a few more hallways--stone, Eclipse thought. Of course it was stone. She'd _seen_ it.--before they stopped and there was the noise of a heavy door opening. Their blindfolds were removed, as was the tape on their mouths and wrists (which hurt, a lot, incidentally). Then they were shoved forward. Shadow nearly fell on her face, and Eclipse just went ahead and _did_ fall on her face.

"Stay quiet."

"Quiet!" Shadow scoffed. "Quiet? You just kidnapped us and put us in a... a..." She looked around. "A dungeon cell! And you expect us to be quiet about it! What are you going to do with us? Rape us? Sell us into slavery? Demand a ransom?"

"Shadow, if you don't stay quiet, I'll tape your mouth shut." His eyes widened. "Oh, hell! I almost forgot!" He grabbed Shadow and wrapped a leather choker necklace around her neck with a red jewel in the middle that sat directly on her throat. Eclipse got one as well, with a blue jewel instead of red.

"What the hell are these?" Shadow asked, poking hers. "OW!"

"Don't touch it."

"Thanks for the warning," the girl muttered bitterly, sucking on her finger and rubbing her head.

"It's a ward necklace," the guy continued, as if Shadow hadn't spoken. "The only person who can touch it without extreme pain to both themselves and you, is me."

"Well then how is it that it can be wrapped around my neck, thus be in contact with me, without me suffering extreme pain?"

"Because it's _designed_ that way. Now shut up."

"Hey Shadow...?" Eclipse said.

"The door is also heavily warded," the kidnapper said, shutting said door. "I wouldn't suggest touching it, either."

"Shadow," Eclipse persisted. The red-eyed girl spun.

"WHAT?"

Eclipse pointed into the corner. "Isn't that your dog?"

Shadow screamed at the top of her voice. "KOKUEI!"

"_WHAT DID I JUST SAY ABOUT BEING QUIET!_" the guy outside the door screamed. Shadow ignored him and rushed to the dog laying in the corner.

"Oh my God, what has he done to you! I thought you were with Karasu? Are you even alive? Kokuei? Kokuei! Hey!"

Eclipse sighed. "This sucks."

Shadow rounded on her friend. "Why weren't you complaining when he was pointing a gun at me? Why weren't you protesting my treatment? Why weren't you trying to save our asses!"

"This is a new experience for me," the girl said. "Why complain?"

Shadow stared at her friend incredulously.

"Hiei and Kurama will find us, don't worry," Eclipse said. Shadow screamed.

"_HIEI!_ OH, GOD, I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT HIEI! MY BABY! MY HIEI! HE'S PROBABLY GOING TO COME HOME HORRIBLY INJURED AND I WON'T BE THERE TO TAKE CARE OF HIM! MY HIEI! MY BABY!"

"Kurama can take care of him."

"Kurama doesn't have the same loving tender touch as I do!"

"Yes he does."

"He'd damn well better not have a loving tender touch on HIEI! Hiei is MINE, and YOUR BOYFRIEND is not going to steal him away from me!" Shadow gasped. "Oh my God! Youko! What if Youko starts hitting on Hiei while we're here and they're there! What if Youko seduces my baby and they make mad, passionate love in MY bed! What if Hiei wants to leave me for Youko!" She grabbed Eclipse's shoulders and shook her back and forth. "IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD!"

"If you keep shaking me like that, my brain'll fall out!" Eclipse snapped, clubbing Shadow in the side of the head with the heel of her hand. Shadow fell over, then jumped back up.

"But what if he does! What if Hiei... what if he... he... What if he gets so totally depressed because he can't find me that he, like, turns to the arms of his best friend for comfort? And the arms of his best friend encompass him, and hold him tightly, and his best friend whispers comforts, and Hiei starts CRYING, and... and... And in order to make him feel better, his best friend kisses him, first gently on the cheek, y'know, just a friend to friend comfort kiss, then Hiei, starved for love and contact, kisses Kurama passionately, and clothes start flying, and soon, Hiei's screaming the fox's name in MY bed, and OH MY GOD THIS IS HORRIBLE!"

Shadow curled up on her feet with her knees to her chest and started rocking back and forth. Eclipse looked at her like she was insane, then went and sat in the corner.

"If Hiei is that weak and pathetic, I'd ditch him."

"YOU _WHAT? _YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! Hiei loves me more than he loves himself! He loves me so much it's like I'm his second half! Which makes no sense, because he had both his halves before he met me... I guess he ditched one when he met me and I have to fill in that space... But... I'm only a half? If I'm his other half, he must be my other half, either that or he's so immense in whatever aspect we're talking about that half of his whatever is ALL of _my_ whatever, so that way it makes it equal, right?"

"If you're his other half and he's your other half, then you're both missing half of you and you have to seek comfort in each other to fill in that space," Eclipse said. Shadow flew to her and grabbed her shoulders again, shaking her so her head smacked against the wall every time.

"Don't you feel that way about Kurama! Kurama loves you! You love Kurama! You belong together! Even though all Youko gives a shit about is screwing you... All Youko gives a shit about is screwing _anybody._ That's why I'm afraid he'll go after Hiei! He would, wouldn't he! Youko would have sex with Hiei, wouldn't he? Hiei's hot, and Youko's a demon, and Youko is a very sexual demon, so he's got to have had sex with another male demon sometime in his life, and he probably liked it, and with us gone, Hiei is the next best thing, and Hiei is vulnerable with us gone, and oh my God, my Hiei is vulnerable to Youko's charm!" Shadow curled up on the ground and started rolling around. "Hiei, Hiei, Hiei, Hiei, Hiei..."

"You're whacked," Eclipse said plainly. "Hiei is fine without you. Kurama is fine without me. And we're both fine without them." She cast another glance at Shadow. "Well, _I'm_ fine without them..."

"Think of the SITUATION! We've been kidnapped by some weirdo, and God knows what he wants, or when he'll let us go, or if he'll contact anyone for a ransom or whatever, and, and, and... Omigod, omigod, omigod!"

Eclipse stood up and kicked Shadow in the side of the head. She slumped over and didn't move for about five minutes. Then she sat up and looked around, rubbing the side of her absently.

"Where are we?"

"We were kidnapped, remember?"

"We were? By who?"

"Some dude with silver eyes and nice muscles and a golden tan. Said his name was Ryosei."

"Ohh, a sexy dude, huh? How come I don't remember it?"

"Because I kicked you in the head."

"Ohhhh..." she said, nodding. Then her brows knitted in confusion. "Why?"

"Because you were panicking. It was unnaturally freaky. So I kicked you. Now you're normal."

"Sweetness."

"Your dog is unconscious in the corner."

"What! But Kokuei was with Karasu!" She rushed over to Kokuei and pulled the dog's large head into her lap. "Maybe whoever kidnapped us killed Karasu."

"That's awful mean of you to say," Eclipse said. "I thought you liked him."

"I do. He's my bitch. I like him well enough. He needs to get a little sun, maybe, but he's pretty hot."

"Well I hate him. I hope he died."

"You skank! You only hate him because he's in love with Kurama!"

"Yeah. So? Kurama's my boyfriend. All competition is my enemy."

"So you hate me? I'm competition. I'm sexy and I can give Kurama a hard-on any day of the year."

"You have a boyfriend, though. And if you're gonna cheat on him with his best friend, he should ditch you."

"Hiei would never ditch me. He loves me too much."

"I bet he'd be pretty pissed if you gave Kurama a blowjob. So would I."

"Who ever said anything about blowjobs? I just said I could give him a hard on. I didn't even say I was going to. What the hell's with you jumping to all these damn conclusions?" She gasped slightly, grinning as her eyes took on an evil glint. She zoomed over and sat next to Eclipse, arm around her shoulders. "So, Eclipse... Have you given Kurama a blowjob yet?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Positive?"

"Yes."

There was a short pause. "I gave Hiei one."

"So I know."

"You do?"

"Yes. You announced it to the world at my end of the school year party thing."

"Oh yeah."

"Did he like it?"

Shadow looked at Eclipse like she was retarded and insane (which of course, she is, but we'll keep that to ourselves). "Did he _like_ it! Of _course_ he liked it! I'm ME! I could give a really shitty blowjob but the guy would still like it because it's _me_, and I'm _sexy_, and I'm the future ruler of the _world_. It's an _HONOR_ to get a blowjob from me!"

"You are so full of yourself it's hilarious." And with that, Eclipse exploded into laughter.

"LAUGH WHILE YOU CAN, PUNY MORTAL!" she said, lunging to her feet and pointing at Eclipse. "SOON, I WILL OWN YOUR SOUL!" And with that, _Shadow_ exploded into laughter. Slightly more evil, maniacal laughter, but laughter all the same.

They both stopped abruptly at the exact same instant.

"I miss Hiei."

"I miss Kurama."

"Where's that cute tanned guy? I want to beat the shit out of him."

"Me too. Let's make a lot of noise so he comes and yells at us."

"Excellent plan. What shall we do?"

"Sing."

"Headbangers?"

"Awesome. Slipknot?"

"Bodom."

"_Bodom..._ Sweet."

And they began singing Children of Bodom. Which, believe me, sung by two girls, it didn't really sound quite the same... But it got somebody's attention. And that was the point.

"**BE QUIET!**"

They silenced instantly.

"... That sounded familiar," Shadow noted.

"It sounded like the voice belonging to somebody we know," Eclipse added.

"That's what I meant by familiar, jackass. 'Familiar' doesn't mean, 'Wow that sounds like I've never heard it before in my life.' 'Familiar' means 'Wow that sounds like something I've heard before.' Jerk."

"Tosser."

"I do not!"

Eclipse snarled. Shadow snarled. Kokuei stirred in the corner. Shadow and Eclipse continued to snarl.

The heavy metal door opened and Ryosei appeared. "I warned you." The boy stepped forward, holding his roll of duct tape threateningly. Shadow and Eclipse zapped over to the wall and were on their knees, bowing repeatedly.

"We're silent."

"Silent as the ninjas."

"You won't know we're here."

There was a pause.

"Weren't we going to beat him up?"

"Oh yeah. Forgot about that."

Ryosei chuckled. "You're just as stupid as he said."

"Stupid!"

"He? He who?"

"My master. This kidnapping wasn't my idea. I'm just a pawn," he confessed.

"Pawn? Like the pieces in chess? The little pansy ones? You're a pansy? Pansy!"

"Since when do pawns realize they're pawns!"

"Since they are told they are pawns," Ryosei explained. "But I'm getting paid for it."

"So you're not really a pawn, because you know you are, and you're getting paid to be one."

"So you're more like a slave."

"A _paid_ slave."

"So more like a servant."

"A _hot_ servant."

"You have a boyfriend!"

"So do you!"

"That doesn't matter! I'm not the one saying some kidnapper is hot!"

"MLEEEHHH! My boyfriend's hotter anyways."

"Yeah, you'd better say that, or I'd tell him."

"Assuming we get out of here." Shadow turned to Ryosei. "Are you gonna let us out of here?"

"He's just a pawn, remember? He doesn't have any say! Pawns are pansies!" Eclipse snapped.

"Oh yeah."

"You'll be released," Ryosei said. "Once my master's demands are met."

"Okay, who is your master? And what are his demands? Is he after my sexy body?" Shadow asked, running her hands down her body seductively.

"No."

"Can we _meet_ your master?" Eclipse asked.

"In due time."

"Can we meet him _now?_"

"I'll ask him. You're quite impatient. You should learn more patience."

"Shut up and ask your boss--"

"Master," Shadow corrected.

"Shut up and ask your _master_ if we can meet him and talk to him and find out why the fuck he needs to use a couple innocent virgin girls to get what he wants," Eclipse demanded.

"I'll be sure to tell him you're both being total and complete bitches, too."

The guy turned and left.

"Good job, Shadow."

"What'd _I_ do?"

"You were _born_, you insuffrable little wench."

"Well that wasn't my fault! I've told you! My parents had to go and fuck and voila! They brought into the world its future dictator." She sniffled and hugged Eclipse tightly. "My father would be so proud!"

"Choking... I'm... choking..."

The door opened and Shadow glanced at it, still suffocating Eclipse with a hug. Her eyes got wide, and she dropped the dying girl on the floor.

"You? YOU! You insuffrable little rat! You dirty, slimy, stanky little hoe!_ You _kidnapped me!"

Shadow strode right up to him and smacked him in the face, leaving a nice red mark on his pale cheek. Then she went to a corner to sulk and pout while their true captor gently touched the mark on his cheek and winced.

"I'm sorry, Shadow," he said. "I was really only after Eclipse."

"I can't believe my own bitch would dare to hire himself a lackey slut to kidnap me."

Karasu sighed. "Shadow..."

"No! Don't talk to me! I'm mad at you now!" She spun around angrily. "And you drugged my dog! That makes it all worse! And you LIED to me! You skanky dirty liar!" She stalked up to him and glared. "I can't believe you'd play friendly with me, then go and kidnap me and throw me in a skanky dirty dungeon like this! You slut."

She moved to slap his other cheek, but he caught her hand and twined his fingers in hers, a small smile on his face.

"Please don't make this hard on me. I told you, I was really just after Eclipse."

"Didn't I tell you not to interfere in their relationship?"

"No. You made me promise not to hurt Kurama. I'm not hurting him."

"You're being a dick. What do you intend to get out of this? If you plan on killing Eclipse..."

"Neither of you will be harmed."

"That's good. I can't say the same for you, though," Shadow said. Again, she moved to slap him. He caught her other hand and twined his fingers with hers.

"Just cooperate. You won't be harmed."

Eclipse lunged at Karasu and tried to choke him. Shadow screeched. Karasu let go of her and pinned Eclipse against the wall.

"Then again, I could always hurt your boyfriends when they come looking for you."

"You wouldn't hurt Kurama, you love him too much," Eclipse snarled.

"I would hurt him if you hurt me. It's the price you pay."

"Eclipse! Don't hurt Karasu! I hate him with a fiery passion now, but he's still MY bitch."

Karasu eased off Eclipse. Shadow continued, "So if anyone gets to hurt him, it's ME!" She launched at Karasu. He ran out of the room and slammed the door.

* * *

Don't you dare like Karasu any less after this story! I love Karasu. I'm aware half my readers hate him, so I'm just saying that me writing this better not make you hate him more. Or else I might have to stop posting it. So if you hate him more after this, don't tell me about it or I'll get mad. See my rage? It's boiling out my ears. 

Oh yeah. Children of Bodom sings headbangers music. The type of music with lots of screaming and incomprehensible words and such. I like them. XD


	2. Always Have A Plan

**(August 10, 2005)** I just got an email saying that this site no longer allows people to reply to reviews within the chapters of their stories. That's stupid. So you can't complain if I don't reply...  
Anyways, I did finish writing this story yesterday, woohoo... And this chapter is shorter than the last one, I think... and I have 42 reviews. How sweet is that... Forty-two reviews on one chapter. At that rate, I'll have 210 at the end of this story. Awesomeness. So, thank you for reviewing and keep up the feedback! I love reading reviews. Really, I do.  
Also, I think I'm going down to my dad's _tomorrow_, and I dunno when I'll be back... Probably Sunday? So you can expect a chapter around then... And I can expect to have like, 50 emails when I get home... Yippee.

* * *

**CHAPTER TWO  
**Lesson Two: Always Have A Plan

"This sucks."

"I noticed."

"I'm tired."

"Sleep."

"I hate you."

"I hate _you. _It's your fault we're like this."

"Mine! How is it mine? You're the one who tried to strangle him!" Shadow snapped. Eclipse glared over at her.

"That's not what I meant! I meant it's your fault we were kidnapped! You trusted the bastard!"

"He's very trustworthy! It's not my fault he's lusting after your boyfriend! Everyone lusts after Kurama, deep down inside. Even Hiei! You're just the lucky little bitch who gets to be the one he lusts after too."

Eclipse sighed. "It's a gift and a curse."

"My nose is itchy."

"Scratch it."

"Shut up you hoebag! You know I can't!" She thrashed violently against the bindings holding her to the wall. Her wrists were out to the sides, and her legs were shoulder-width apart, shackled to the wall at her ankles. Eclipse was enjoying the same treatment. Kokuei was sitting in the corner with a heavy metal collar around her neck and a heavy chain holding her to the wall. It was a miracle she could stand up with all that weight. Fortunately for her, though, she had enough slack to wander most of the room, unlike the psycho girls. Just so long as she didn't get near the door. It was a safety precaution, Karasu had said as he chained up the still-groggy dog about fifteen minutes after running away from Shadow. To avoid any unwanted amputation and or organ removal. And, of course, because if Kokuei touched the warded door, she'd be zapped and probably die, he'd added as an afterthought.

They'd been away from Shadow's house for about four hours now. They could only hope the tantei had gotten back from their mission and started to worry.

The door opened and Karasu walked in.

"Are you both doing okay?"

Eclipse made some noncommittal pissed-off growly groan noise. Kokuei sighed and looked at him unhappily without moving her head. Shadow was looking at him quizzically.

"So what is the benefit of having me here?" she asked.

Karasu shrugged.

"So why don't you just let me go?"

"I want to keep you here. I like you."

"Well, I'm honored. But if you really liked me... I WOULDN'T BE CHAINED TO THE WALL LIKE THIS!" she screamed, thrashing around wildly. She smacked her head against the wall and her vision blurred momentarily. "Ow..."

The crow smiled a bit. "I wanted to talk to you anyway, Shadow. Promise me you won't try to run."

"Run? Of course I won't run. I'm chained to a wall."

"No, I meant I want to talk to you in private. I want to unchain you and take you upstairs. Do I have to bind your wrists and blindfold you to make sure you won't run for it?"

"I won't run. But only 'cause you've got my dog."

Eclipse frowned. "I feel the love."

"And also because Eclipse is here," Shadow added as the crow walked closer. He kicked the shackles on her ankles and they popped open, then he moved to her wrists, pulling a key out of his pocket and opening the shackles there.

"Come with me."

"Bye Eclipse." She went over and petted Kokuei where she sat. "I'll be back, Kokuei, don't you worry your little head about me." She skipped away, ignoring the dog's displeased look. Karasu shut the door behind her and led her up the spiral stairs. He led her through various hallways. The upstairs halls were much less dungeon-like than the downstairs ones. Everything was made of stone and undecorated except for the occasional torch, and the carpet on the floor. It was all much cleaner than the downstairs. But, like downstairs, it all looked pretty much the same.

"Where are we going?" Shadow asked.

"You'll see," Karasu replied calmly. She shrugged and stuck her hands in her pockets, following him until he stopped outside a door that was identical to all the others they'd passed. He opened it and stood aside to let her in. "Ladies first."

Shadow cautiously stepped into the room. It looked like it was made for royalty. Canopy bed, ornate furniture of all sorts, and everything in shades of red, purple, and gold. From what she'd seen of this place, it was like they were in an old stone castle, like the ones in England. But from what she knew of the terrain surrounding her home, there was no English castle an hour's drive and twenty minutes' walk away from her house.

"Where is this place?"

"It's not your concern. Sit down." He gestured to the bed. She sat down in the middle with her legs and arms crossed.

"Okay, you have some explaining to do, bitch," she said, eyes narrowed. "I assume that's why you brought me up here?"

"Partly. Shadow... I need your help."

She blinked. "With what?"

"You won't be happy."

"Kurama?"

"Well... sort of."

"Just spit it out!"

"I want you to help me get over Kurama."

Shadow's eyes widened. "Oh yeah?"

"Yes."

"You're sure?"

He hesitated, then nodded. Shadow smiled. "That's good!" Then she looked at him suspiciously. "But how the hell am I supposed to help?"

"Well that's the thing..." He sat next to her. "You're beautiful, Shadow."

"Yeah... and?"

"I just thought... You know... That you'd be able to... maybe... give me something Kurama can't."

"Oh? OH! No way!" She leapt off the bed in a second. "Me and my body belong to _Hiei_ and I'm not going to do anything sexual with _you_."

"But there's no other way, is there? Either I take Kurama, or I take you!"

"Why don't you take that Ryosei lackey of yours?"

"I already did," Karasu muttered dejectedly. "But it wasn't the same. I couldn't get Kurama out of my mind!"

"But I thought you wanted to kill Kurama!"

"I can't kill him! It's just not right!"

"But you like to kill things you love!"

"I realized that was a stupid philosophy!"

"Well stop it!"

Karasu looked confused. Shadow crossed her arms and went into lecture mode.

"I admire that you want to get over him. But you clearly have no idea how to go about it. Having sex with me will not help you. I do not want to have sex with you. Kurama does not want youat _all_. Just appreciate that you have friends. Appreciate that Kurama doesn't try to kill you every time he sees you. Appreciate that he can be in the same room with you and not be ready to rip out your throat with every move you make. And let me and Eclipse and Kokuei go home without any hard feelings. You're being very foolish, Karasu."

"But Shadow-!"

She walked over and sat on the bed next to him again. "Maybe you should go back to Makai. You've changed a lot since you were revived. I think it would do you good."

"But... Kurama..."

"Kurama has his life under control. You need to get yours under control." She put an arm around his shoulders. "You can't let your emotions push you around. _You_ need to be in control. If you're going to make decisions, don't base them on the people around you; base them on what you feel like doing. For example, if I were to be as in control of my emotions as I claim to be, I would be able to just up and leave Hiei whenever I felt like it. But you see, I let my emotions influence me and now I'm stuck with him. I could never leave Hiei, because my emotions would probably rip me apart from the inside, out."

"But you're happy."

"What?"

"You're happy with Hiei."

"Yes, but that's not the point I'm making. When I committed to him, I lost my freedom. If I hadn't committed to Hiei, I would have sex with you right here and now. As it is, you'll have to settle for a kiss. And he'll be pissed if he ever finds out." She pushed the crow down on the bed and kissed him passionately. When she pulled away from the stunned--and now horny--demon, she glared. "Mention a word of this to Hiei and I'll kill you."

He nodded mutely. She continued sitting on him, looking thoughtful. "You're not going to start lusting after me, are you? I mean, I'm honored to be like, the next best thing to Kurama, or whatever you seem to think I am, but while Kurama tolerates you, if you start wanting my body, Hiei will kill you. And I will maim your corpse."

Again, he nodded, looking slightly frightened. Shadow smiled. "So what have you learned today?"

"You're really scary."

Shadow cracked up laughing. "Yes, thank you. But that wasn't the point of the LECTURE you forced me to think up!"

"I should get over Kurama, move on with my life, and harassing you won't help me do that."

"Good job."

"But I can't get over him!"

"You know, I'm sure there are plenty of beautiful demons in Makai. Why go after a human?"

"He's _Youko Kurama!_"

"He hates you! You know, I went back in time once and met this really beautiful demon. His name was Sesshoumaru. He was so much better than Kurama. I bet he's still alive. You should go to Makai and try to find him. I wonder how he'd handle sexual advances from a male."

"How did he handle them from a female?" Karasu asked nervously.

"Well, I didn't really make any sexual advances."

"...Oh."

"But I bet he'd totally murder you if you touched him."

"Oh."

"So maybe you shouldn't look for him. How about..." She thought for a minute. "How about you just go to Makai and see what you can find? Surely you've seen beautiful demons in Makai before."

"Of course I have. I killed most of them."

Shadow frowned. "That is no way to go about seducing someone!" she admonished. "And all that creepy dirty talk you were shooting at Kurama during the Ankoku Bujutsukai was a lousy attempt at seduction too. Some people like pain, but only clinically depressed people would like you for killing them. And also freaks who think like you about the whole... soul departing from the body et cetera, et cetera, intimacy thing... What the hell makes you think that, anyway?"

"It's not physical. Physical intimacy is limited."

"THEN WHY DO YOU WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH KURAMA!"

"Because I _DO_ like sex, just like any other demon! It's limited, I know, but sometimes I'd rather have sex with someone than kill them. And I want to have sex with Kurama! Maybe after I've satisfied my body's lust, I'll satisfy my soul's!"

"Oh! Okay! So you mean you'll have sex with him, then after you've shared that moment of undescribable pleasure with him, you'll murder him? Did you ever think of how HE might feel about that! Maybe Kurama WANTS to live a little longer! He has a family, friends, Eclipse, a life, school, all that to worry about! And how is DYING intimate for HIM! He's dead! How do you think he'd feel after that!"

"He could come back."

"No he couldn't! He has the soul of Youko Kurama! He wouldn't come back the SAME unless they tore Youko's soul out of him while he was just peachy keen and happily screwing some sexy demon chick in Makai, and stuck it into a body! And we all know they won't do THAT! And besides! I'm sure there's all kinds of paperwork and shit Koenma would have to go through if he were to do that! So, no, he could never come back! You would kill him just to satisfy yourself? You would make your greatest love suffer like that?"

"...No."

"Good!"

"But I still want to have sex with him."

"Well at least you don't want to kill him anymore. That's a start." She got off him and let him get up from the bed. "I'm sure you have a lot to think about. Is there anything else you need from me?"

"I don't think so." He walked her to the door and opened it, and there stood Ryosei, awaiting orders. "Take her back downstairs."

_**

* * *

**_

It took the tantei quite some time to get out of the corn field. Longer than it had taken them to get thoroughly lost in it in the first place, considering how all it had taken was a few low class demons running around erratically to get them completely and totally lost without them even realizing it.

But finally, they got out of the field and made their way home.

Yusuke and Kuwabara went to their own houses, but Kurama followed Hiei home. He'd left Eclipse at Shadow's, so there was no reason to think she'd have left already. They were only gone for a few hours.

Oddly enough, though, no screamy squealy fanatically happy girls greeted them at the door with vice-grip hugs and passionate kisses. No girls were sleeping in the living room, where they'd been left. They weren't in the kitchen, the dining room, downstairs, upstairs, outside, or in fact, anywhere to be found.

"Maybe they went to Eclipse's," Kurama suggested, shrugging it off.

"Why would they bother?" Hiei replied, opening a few random doors as they stood in the second floor hall. He had the grave misfortune of opening the door with the weasels behind it.

It had barely been open for a second when a white weasel came flying out and lunged up, digging her little claws into his stomach and scurrying up to his shoulder.

"Get off me!" he snapped. She made a chittery angry noise as he grabbed her and dug her claws into his skin. "Damn rodent! Get off!"

Inside the room, Norman lunged off a raised pedestal and ran through the mass of weasels, coming out the other side flanked by two normally-colored weasels on each side.

"Hiei, be nicer. Maybe she'll leave you alone then," Kurama suggested.

"No! Being nice will just encourage her."

Norman zipped up Hiei's back, carefully avoiding digging his claws into the demon's skin, lunged from about halfway down Hiei's back, and tackled Daisy. Hiei jerked his hand away quickly as the blue weasel slammed into her and sent her sliding down off his shoulder, leaving scrapes down his chest but managing to stop on his abs. Norman dug his claws into _her_ so he wouldn't tumble onto the floor. Daisy couldn't let go to defend herself or she'd fall to the weasel minions waiting below.

"I take it she's not popular amongst her own kind, either?" Kurama asked.

"Obviously not," Hiei muttered, wincing slightly as the claws dug deeper into his flesh. "I'm getting more injuries from this god damned weasel than I did fighting demons!"

Norman finally managed to dislodge Daisy both of them were sent tumbling down to the floor. The four weasels who'd flanked the weasel lord over jumped on her the second he was out of the way. Kurama was comically reminded of people wrestling a crocodile...

The four weasels dragged Daisy through the door and out of sight. Norman saluted Hiei before turning and scurrying back after them. The fire demon quickly shut the door.

"Dammit," he muttered, looking at his chest.

"C'mon," Kurama sighed. "Typical that you get hurt more at home than you do on missions. Judging by the looks of Daisy, she's a walking infection just waiting to happen."

"Great." Hiei trailed after Kurama to the infirmary, where he stripped off his shirt and let the fox clean his cuts. While he did that, they speculated on where their girlfriends could possibly be.

"We didn't check Eclipse's," Kurama said. "Maybe they're there. Maybe Eclipse had some brilliant solution to their boredom."

"You'd think Shadow would be the one to do that. She's the one with rooms that lead to anything you could possibly want... Ow!"

"Sorry. You wouldn't think weasels would cause such deep cuts."

"Did you see the great hygeine of that particular weasel? She looked like she was falling apart. So her claws were probably abnormally long too. It's like she's the outcast hobo weasel."

"And she loves you."

"Don't remind me. Ow! That stings!"

"Sor-_ry_." Kurama dabbed a bit more alcohol on the cuts before bandaging them up. Hiei sighed.

"Call Eclipse's house."

"Why? You can't stand me?"

"She'll want to know you're back, won't she?"

"You have a point." He grabbed Hiei's discarded shirt and handed it to him, pulling out his cell phone from his pocket. He dialed Eclipse's home phone number and waited. Her father answered, and told him Eclipse was at Shadow's house.

"Oh. Thank you, sir. Good-bye," he said politely, and hung up. Hiei looked at his thoughtful face with confusion.

"What is it?"

"Her father says she's here."

"Maybe she's just on her way home. Doesn't she have a cell phone?"

"Yeah... I have her number in here somewhere... She just got it recently so I haven't memorized the number yet." He grinned at his friend. Hiei rolled his eyes. After a minute, the redhead put his phone to his ear and waited for an answer.

_**

* * *

**_

Shadow was following along behind Ryosei innocently, watching the fascinating identical stone bricks go by.

"You know," she said, jogging a couple steps to catch up, "it's been a long time since I felt the love of a man."

Ryosei faltered in his step, stopped, and turned to look at her. "What?"

Her arms went around his neck and she continued seductively, "You're so strong and handsome, Ryosei-san. I know you can give me what I want."

"What are you talking about? Don't try to fool me. Karasu-sama told me all about your relationship with Hiei." He didn't sound too sure of himself.

"I'm only using Hiei. _You_ are the kind of man I could really _love._"

"You... You don't love Hiei?"

"Hmmmm," she hummed, kissing his neck. She put her leg between his and gently rubbed his inner thigh.

"Ohh... Y-you shouldn't..." He gasped as she rubbed higher, right against his crotch.

"You really are hot, Ryosei."

**_SLAM!_**

She kneed him. He fell and she took off running.

"GET BACK HERE!" he screamed, attempting to get up and failing miserably.

Once she'd reached the dungeons, she realized she had no idea how to get out of the building. And another thing occured to her.

The leather ward around her neck couldn't be removed.

Then ANOTHER thing occured to her.

She didn't have the keys for the shackles holding Eclipse.

Then it occured to her... y'know... Every girl for herself.

She ran straight past the dungeon Eclipse and Kokuei were in, and found the next set of stairs leading upwards. Taking those, she found herself somewhere she had never been before. But that was okay. If she were to take anything from her previous experiences of getting lost while pursued, it would be that she typically didn't end up with the predicted results, but the result she got instead was usually okay too.

So she just kept running, up stairs, down stairs, down halls, up halls, through rooms, until she suddenly found herself sprawled on her ass on the ground. She'd run into something. Something tall, and black, and frowning.

"Oh! Hi Karasu!"

"Shadow, I'm very disappointed in you."

"I figured you would be." She got up and dusted herself off. "So... It's back to the dungeon, yes?"

"Yes." He grabbed her arm and led her back to the dungeon. She didn't struggle; in fact, she strolled along like it was no big deal, smiling and everything. The crow was locking the last shackle back into place when a goofy little song started playing from Eclipse's direction. Her eyes widened momentarily, then narrowed and darted around suspiciously.

"What's that?" she asked sharply, attempting to cover up for herself.

Karasu slowly turned to face her. Shadow was happily swinging her head from side to side with a frighteningly too-happy smile on her face as she 'danced' to the cell's ring tone.

"This may work out better than I'd expected." He smirked. "What better way to deliver the news of your capture?" His pale fingers slid into her pocket and pulled out her phone. Looking at the display, he grinned. "Well if it isn't your beautiful boyfriend, Eclipse." He paused. "On second thought..."

"ANSWER IT BEFORE HE HANGS UP, DAMMIT!" Eclipse screamed.

"Ryosei!"

The half-demon appeared in the doorway.

"Answer this. Sound threatening."

"What do I tell him?"

"Two days from now at midnight. Come alone. Give him directions to the drop-off point. You'll meet him there."

Ryosei answered. "Hello, Kurama."

"Who is this!" Kurama asked, startled. Hiei's head snapped up and he looked at the fox with alarm.

"We have your precious girlfriend. And Shadow, too."

The fox's mind started racing. "Who are you?"

"That's not important, Kurama. If you want them back, you will come alone. Two days from now, at midnight." He gave him directions to the 'drop-off point,' the place where he had stopped driving when he'd abducted the girls. "That's about an hour of driving time from Shadow's house, so you would be wise to leave in time. They are unharmed, and will remain that way, as long as you follow my instructions."

"What do you want?"

"Just that. Come alone." He smirked.

Shadow very abruptly realized she was dancing to music that didn't exist anymore and hadn't for about five minutes and stopped swinging her head around. She looked at the phone and made another brilliant plan.

"KURAMA! KURAMA! DON'T COME ALONE! HE WANTS TO--Mmmph!"

Karasu smacked his hand over her mouth. "Shhhh. You don't want me to be even _more_ cross with you, do you?" he whispered. She shook her head. Then she narrowed her eyes and bit his finger.

"I shouldn't care if you're mad at me, bitch!"

Karasu glared. "You're in for a beating if you don't cool it, girl."

Kokuei started barking fiercely. Eclipse yelled into the phone, "I love you, Kurama!"

Ryosei frowned. "I believe that's all the assurance of their well-being that you need, Kurama. Come **alone.** Good-bye."

He snapped the phone shut, effectively ending the call. Karasu glared at Shadow, but before he could say anything, she asked, "Why two days from now?"

"I need some time," the crow answered. "Maybe with your help, I'll be able to get over him before he shows up."

"Ha," Eclipse said bitterly.

"I doubt it," Shadow said, "but we can certainly try to make you see how many flaws Kurama has. However... considering your level of lovesickness, there is no cure apart from him loving you back. Or him killing you."

"I'll love Kurama even in death."

"Well, in that case, there is no cure whatsoever, and any attempt I make at curing you is a fool's errand. I'm really hungry right now, though, Karasu. Oh, by the way, Ryosei, how are your... family jewels faring?"

The boy frowned.

"Oh, I'm so sorry. But... you know. Whatever works. And I wasn't lying about you being hot, if that makes you feel any better."

"It really doesn't, but thanks for trying."

"I'm hungry!" Eclipse said. "Give me food or I'll die and Kurama will hate you! More than he already does!"

"Fine. You'll get food in a little bit. Ryosei, let's go."

The kidnappers left, shutting the door and once again plunging the girls into nearly complete darkness.

* * *

Yay...  
Also... I'm on a music quest. Does anyone have any recommendations? Not rap, and not country... and not classical stuff, either. Or opera. But otherwise I'll pretty much listen to anything. I'm not too picky. I mostly prefer rock and heavy metal and such... Music is extremely helpful in helping me think, you know. And you know that when I think, you get stories. So... start suggesting! XD 


	3. Be On Your Best Behavior

**(August 14, 2005)** So, I did my school shopping on Friday... And I'm very happy. I got a black shirt with Sesshoumaru on it, and a red shirt with Hiei & Yusuke. I almost don't want to wear them cuz I don't want anything to happen to them, y'know? Pathetic, yes. I'm probably gonna go get my schedule tomorrow, and find out what my homeroom is and crap... So huzzah for that... I hate school. But oddly enough, I'm not really dreading it. But I'm not looking forward to it, either. It's that, "Yeah, it's gonna happen and I can't change it. Life goes on." ...Which seems to be my philosophy for everything... Which is why I don't stress over things... Which is why I'll live longer than two of my three friends, and half the population of the world.

Now, to talk about something you care about: **Thank you for the music recommendations!** Especially to Lord of the dark Fluffiness, who gave me an immensely long list... I didn't even read all of it yet...I'm downloading Daft Punk right now (thank you akuavari. I love music with a dance beat)... Some people recommended things I already listen to. System of a Down, Nightwish, Metallica... Phantom of the Opera... Evanescence... I don't even remember what all...  
**Thanks for the reviews! Keep 'em coming! I DEMAND IT.

* * *

**

**CHAPTER THREE  
**Lesson Three: Be on your Best Behavior

Hiei's first reaction when Kurama told him about the phone conversation was a lot of anger. He vanished spontaneously and came back a few hours later covered in sweat and missing his shirt. Kurama looked at him with question in his green eyes.

"I'm better now," the fire demon said, tossing his sword on the coffee table. He sighed and plopped down on the couch next to Kurama. "I'm not going to let you go alone, you know."

"Hiei..."

"Don't argue."

"Shadow can handle herself. You don't need to go with me to make sure she's okay."

Hiei frowned. "Why jump to the conclusion that I'm only worried about _her?_"

"Because you are," the boy replied, smiling.

"Hn. I know you can handle yourself, fox, and I know she can, too. Usually. But it's not in my nature to sit around and do nothing."

"I know."

"And?"

Kurama sighed. "If those girls truly are in danger this time, it's probably best we do what the kidnapper asked."

"Why you?" Hiei asked. "Whoever it is kidnapped **both** of them, _and_ the dog. So why just you?"

"I don't know, Hiei."

The fire demon got up and grabbed his sword.

"Where are you going?" the fox asked suspiciously.

"Upstairs. Calm down. I'm not gonna do anything stupid."

"Sorry."

Hiei came back down after taking a shower, and was just about to sit down when the doorbell rang. He growled, but went and answered it, looking irritably up at Yusuke and Kuwabara.

"What?"

"Whoa, don't bite off my head, Hiei... Jeesh. We just came to hang out, like usual." Hiei continued looking at him irritably. "Um... so, you gonna invite us in?"

He sighed and stood aside. Kuwabara passed him with his cat clutched to his chest and paused.

"Um... that dog isn't here, is it?"

"No, she isn't," Hiei said bitterly. "And neither is her owner."

"Shadow? Shadow's not here?" Yusuke asked. "Where is she!"

Hiei shrugged. "I don't know."

"You don't _know?_ Some boyfriend you are."

"Shut up."

The teen narrowed his eyes. "Did something happen?"

"Shadow and Eclipse have been... kidnapped," Kurama said from the doorway. Kuwabara's eyes widened.

"What! When? How? By who? Why aren't you trying to save them?"

"We _are_," Hiei spat. Then he looked away, "Well..."

"Well _what?_"

"Would you stop snapping at me like it's my fault!" the fire demon barked. Kuwabara hid behind Yusuke.

"You know, it was only a matter of time," the brown-eyed teen pointed out. "The way those two talked to strangers and such all the time..."

Hiei glared and Yusuke instantly cowered away.

"He does have a point," Kurama admitted. "They _should_ be more careful."

"Thank you, Kurama!"

"Shadow _is_ careful," Hiei said.

"Ha!"

"She is. She just doesn't act like it."

"She's like an atomic bomb waiting to go off, right?" Yusuke said sarcastically.

"Actually, she probably is."

The teen gave Hiei a funny look, then strolled over to Kurama and threw an arm around the redhead's shoulders. Lowering his voice, he asked, "Is Hiei talking about the same Shadow we are?"

"Yusuke..."

"Is Hiei... perhaps... under the influence of illegal substances?"

"_Yusuke!_"

"I'm kidding! So... Were they really kidnapped?"

"**_Yes!_**"

"Oh. Wow. I thought you were joking!" He ran his hand through his hair. "That's not good. So what are you doing about it? Did you get a ransom note or something?"

"Something like that." They all went to the living room and the fox explained what had happened.

"So you're just gonna SIT HERE for two days?" Kuwabara cried.

"I don't know that there's a whole lot _else_ we can do," the fox snapped.

"I don't think whoever it is knew what they were undertaking," Yusuke chuckled.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, to keep those two girls quiet for that long would take nothing short of... well, nothing can keep them quiet apart from you two."

"That's what I'm worried about. They're so stupid they'll end up getting themselves killed before I can get there," Kurama muttered.

"Oh, but not Shadow. She's careful, remember?" Yusuke taunted.

"Shut _up!_" Hiei snapped.

"Somebody needs a hug! C'mere, Hiei!" The teen threw his arms wide and smiled. Hiei got up and left the room. Yusuke shuddered. "I thought he was gonna come over here and actually hug me. _Then_ I would have worried."

"You should be worried _anyways!_" Kuwabara admonished. "They're our friends."

"Of course I'm worried. But they have managed to get out of life and death situations _before_... I'm sure there's nothing really to worry about, right?"

Kurama's cell phone rang. The second he answered it, sound exploded out of it, so loud he nearly dropped it from surprise. Yusuke smacked his hands over his ears. After a second, it quieted to a more bearable volume, like loud music instead of a jet taking off.

"HOW DO YOU MAKE THEM STOP?" somebody screamed over the singing voices. Kurama stared at the phone. Now he realized... it was Shadow and Eclipse singing. And their kidnapper had called him seeking help on how to shut them up.

Yusuke snatched the phone. "Why should we help you? I think you deserve it for kidnapping them, you bastard!"

"If they don't stop soon," Ryosei snarled, "I'm going to beat them upside the head with a metal pipe until they pass out in their own blood."

Shadow and Eclipse silenced instantly. Yusuke looked at the phone.

"What happened!" he asked.

"They... they stopped!"

Hiei appeared next to Yusuke, making him scream like a girl from surprise. "Jesus, Hiei!"

"HIEI!" exploded out of the phone. "I LOVE YOU!"

"What's going on?" the fire demon asked, looking at Kurama.

"They were singing and the guy called to find out how to stop them. They just stopped."

"What did he do!"

"Nothing."

"Threatened them," Yusuke corrected.

"I CAN HEAR HIEI'S VOICE!" Shadow's voice proclaimed happily. "It makes me want to SING!"

"NOOOO!" Ryosei shrieked as the girl took a deep breath. She let out a wolf howl, which Kokuei echoed, then started singing something in English, dancing as best she could while chained to a wall. "HOW DO YOU MAKE THEM STOP?"

Hiei snickered. "At least we know she's giving them hell."

Eclipse joined in singing.

"SHUT UP!" exploded out of the phone, directed at the girls. They didn't even lower their voices.

"Oh, shove it!" Yusuke snapped into the phone. "They're not even singing that loud anymore! Deal with it! At least they're good singers, not some tone-deaf morons."

"You don't under_stand!_ They've been singing since that phone call _hours ago!_"

Kurama snickered.

"I've tried everything short of sedatives to shut them up!" Ryosei continued. "I put duct tape over their mouths and they _ATE IT!_ What sane creature eats _duct tape!_ Then I put cloth gags in their mouths and they chewed through them, humming the whole time! And kept singing afterwards! I'm on my last nerve!"

"About all you can do with those two is wait it out. They'll stop on their own eventually," Yusuke advised helpfully.

"Who the hell are you, anyways? I called Kurama's cell phone."

"Kurama's here."

"Well put him on the damn phone. It's his girlfriend, not yours."

"Kurama, he wants to talk to you," Yusuke said, handing the fox his phone.

"Hello," Kurama answered, smirking.

"How do you make them stop?"

"Letting them go might do it."

"I can't let them go."

"Then there's nothing you can do."

"Can't I drug them?"

"Drugs don't effect them like normal people. You'll get a very negative effect."

"Like what?"

"Like them being hyper."

"What about elephant tranquilizers?"

"_Elephant tranquilizers!_"

Yusuke snickered. Hiei kicked him subtly, but hard enough to hurt a lot. He cringed and glared at his smaller friend.

"Okay, okay. I know I can't hurt them. I'm under or--I mean, I know better than to anger you."

Kurama nodded thoughtfully, but said nothing. Then he noticed something. "Why did they stop singing?"

Ryosei turned and looked at the girls. "My God! They're asleep!"

"See?"

"He said they'd stop after a while," Ryosei muttered to himself. He continued coldly, not seeming to realize he'd spoken aloud. "This doesn't change anything. You're still to come alone in two days at midnight."

"I know." He smirked. "You didn't really know what you were undertaking when you kidnapped them, did you?"

"I can handle it." He hung up.

Kurama snickered. "Sure you can." He stuck his phone back in his pocket.

"Well?" Hiei asked.

"I just learned a few things," the redhead said. "First, he's not working alone. In fact, this entire thing was not his idea. Second, he will not harm the girls. Or Kokuei, I'm sure. He slipped up and said he's under orders not to."

"And?" Yusuke prompted.

"Whoever kidnapped them... Knows them."

"How do you figure that?" Kuwabara asked.

"When they stopped singing, he muttered to himself. 'He said they'd stop after a while.' I don't think he realized he'd said it, because he didn't try to cover it up."

"Why would anyone who knows them want to kidnap them?" Yusuke wondered. "Wouldn't they know that's one of the stupidest things any creature could do?"

Kurama barely heard him. He was too busy putting together all the information, to try to figure out who the kidnapper was. It really wasn't too difficult.

**_

* * *

_**  
The second Ryosei snapped Eclipse's cell phone shut, Karasu's voice spoke from behind him. 

"What are you doing with that?"

The younger boy jumped, nearly dropping the phone. The crow snatched it out of his hand.

"You didn't call anyone, did you?" he asked sharply.

Ryosei's eyes grew wide and watery. "I'm sorry! But... but... I just couldn't handle them anymore!"

"What did you say?"

"I never mentioned your name... but I might have slipped up and let him know I'm not the one running this whole operation. I'm really sorry." He looked on the verge of tears.

Karasu frowned. "We can assume he's figured out who's in charge, then, right?"

"If he's as smart as you said..." His mind was working furiously to remember everything he'd said. "Please forgive me. I'll do anything."

"Normally... such a foolish mistake would be rewarded with death." Ryosei cringed. "But... since you've been good so far... and seeing as how I still need you..." He smirked after a short pause. "Those girls can drive anyone insane. Just don't let it happen again."

"Oh, thank you! I_ love _you! You're such a _kind_ and _understanding_ master!" Shadow interrupted ecstatically, making both of them jump. Karasu turned to glare at her. "Yeah, hey, I don't mean to interrupt or anything right there or nothin'... but I have to go to the bathroom. Really bad."

The crow let out a heavy sigh. "Ryosei... take her down the hall to the bathroom."

"Yessir." The half-demon unchained her and they left the dungeon. After a moment, Karasu squatted down in front of Kokuei.

"It's really not your fault you're here you know."

_Yes,_ the dog thought, _it's entirely yours. I hold nothing against you, of course._ She lunged out of her lying-down position with amazing speed and latched onto Karasu's arm, digging in her fangs and snarling, thrashing her head back and forth. Eclipse let out a whoop.

"RIP 'IM TO PIECES, KOKUEI! YOU'RE DA MAN!"

Shadow appeared in the doorway with Ryosei behind her. "Kokuei!"

Karasu managed to dislodge the dog's sharp teeth and send her against the wall behind her. She got up in a second and leapt at him again, but reached the end of her chain and flipped around, slamming into the floor with nothing more than a grunt of lost breath to show that it hurt.

"What the hell is wrong with your dog!" Karasu yelled angrily, cradling his bleeding and torn arm. Kokuei lunged to the end of her chain and stood on her back legs, barking furiously, blood-covered fangs shimmering in the dim light from the hallway. Then, suddenly, she stopped, trotted back to the corner, and lay down with her back to them.

"She says 'No hard feelings,'" Shadow said, grinning. "I guess she thought you needed it."

"Bring Shadow along," Karasu said to Ryosei, pushing past them to go out in the hall. "She's going to take care of this wound."

"I can, sir," Ryosei offered. "Really, I can."

"I said Shadow. Bring her."

"Yes sir," he sighed, grabbing Shadow's arm. He shut the door and dragged her down the torch-lit hall behind Karasu. They went upstairs, down a different maze of hallways, and entered something of an infirmary. Everything was lit by torches, everything was made of stone (except the beds and such). Same as everywhere else in this maze.

"This is a really odd place you have here, Karasu," Shadow said. "Why aren't there any windows?"

"Shut up, that's not important."

"Sorry. So, my patient... Sit." She pointed to a bed. Karasu obeyed and the girl pulled off his shirt with no regard to how the fabric pulling across his bloody, gashed-up arm might feel. He hissed in pain. Of course, she ignored him and grabbed his wrist, pulling his arm straight and putting his hand on the bed. "Oohh. Yummy. Look at all that blood."

Karasu sighed. "It does actually hurt, Shadow. If you could do something about that?"

"You can't take pain?"

"Of course I can!"

"Good. Good, good, good. Okay. I'll need... hot water, cloths, bandages, antibacterials, and pain killers."

Ryosei's eyes widened. Shadow rounded on him.

"This _is_ an infirmary, isn't it? Don't you have hot water in this place? Tylenol? Bandages?"

"Of course we do," he said, and hurried off.

"Excellent." The girl went back to examining the wound. She yawned. "Karasu, can't you make someone else do this? Isn't it a little late?"

"It's night, yes. But you have to do this because your dog did the damage."

"But, y'know... you mean your lover can't? Er, lackey? Er... slave? Servant? Pawn?" She smiled innocently.

"No, he can't. He's not a doctor."

"Neither am I!"

"You're more of one than he is."

"I'm telling him you said that!"

"He heard me. He's only right over there." He gestured with his other hand. Ryosei was coming towards them with all the stuff Shadow had asked for.

"Excellent. This is going to hurt, Karasu, considering how I'm tired and you're forcing this upon me, and also how I'm very sore about being kidnapped, so I'm not in any frame of mind to care a whole shitload about your general well-being."

"Oh... Great."

**_

* * *

_**  
Yusuke and Kuwabara stayed at Shadow's house, as did Kurama. The fox had made a rather solid guess at who the kidnapper was, and therefore couldn't sleep. He was sitting on the couch channel surfing when Hiei seemingly materialized out of the darkness. 

"Can't sleep, fox?"

"No." He looked at his friend. "What about you?"

"Kuwabara's snoring could keep anyone awake."

Kurama smiled. "That's not why I'm up."

"I had guessed as much. You think you know who it was, right? You wouldn't say it earlier."

"Surely you have your theory, too, Hiei?"

"Of course I do. Putting together what you said, plus the fact that Karasu hasn't shown up yet today, and that the bastard wants you to come alone..."

"Yes..."

"Which is only one more reason for me to go with you."

"What, be my bodyguard?" He chuckled. "I appreciate it, Hiei, but..."

"Fine," Hiei said, cutting him off. He didn't sound angry or upset.

"I'm worried, though." Kurama flicked off the TV and sighed. "I know what he'll be demanding, and I can't give it to him."

"So just kill him."

"It sounds simple, doesn't it."

They lapsed into silence, both lost in their own thoughts.

Morning found the two demons asleep on the couch, Hiei's head pillowed on Kurama's thigh as the fox lay on his side. And of course, since Yusuke typically isn't a morning person, the one day he does manage to get up before noon was today.

The teen strolled into the living room in the same pair of jeans he'd worn the previous day, then slept in, wearing no shirt, and stopped dead. At least they weren't in each others arms, he thought. They could brush this one off, but he'd still give them hell about it. He cleared his throat to give them time to wake up before he reached them. Neither did, so he walked over to the couch and thought for a minute, then tapped Kurama's forehead several times with two fingers.

One eye snapped open instantly and he looked at Yusuke. Alert went to calm, to tired, to confused, and he moved slightly and looked at his leg. A small smile crossed the fox's lips. Yusuke put one finger to his lips to shush anything the teen was thinking about saying, and he stepped over to Hiei and jabbed him in the side. Hiei twisted away, grabbing Yusuke's wrist with one hand and his throat with the other. Instantly recognizing the boy when he actually bothered to look at him, he let go without harming him. Then he looked at Kurama, then back to Yusuke, and sighed.

"Okay, what did I miss out on this time?"

"You were sleeping on the fox's leg," Yusuke snickered. Hiei looked to Kurama, who smiled.

"I thought it was cute."

"Yay, now I'm cute," Hiei muttered sarcastically.

"You've always been cute, Hiei," Yusuke taunted. "I don't mean to sound like I'm hitting on you or something--"

"If anyone tried hitting on me by saying I was cute, I'd knock their teeth out."

"Nobody would hit on you, Hiei. You're a jerk, and you're taken."

"Thanks," the little demon muttered. Kurama sighed, then smiled slightly.

"I'll make breakfast." He got up and headed for the kitchen.

* * *

Shadow and Eclipse didn't wake up until shortly after noon. Yes, despite being chained to a wall, upright, they still managed to sleep for over 12 hours. Shadow woke up first, blinked, and started shouting instantly, before a single thought had even formed in her head. One had already formed in her stomach. 

"KARASUUU! KA-RA-SUUU! KARA-SUUUU KA-RASU! KAR-ASS-EW! Car ass ew? Hahahaha!"

The door flew open and slammed into the wall.

"_What?_" It wasn't Car Ass Ew. It was Ryosei.

"Oh, good morning, darling."

"Afternoon," Ryosei corrected.

"Huh?"

"It's close to 1:00."

"Oh. Good afternoon, darling. I was trying to get Car Ass Ew's attention."

"Who?"

"Karasu."

"Karasu-sama is resting. What do you want?"

"Some breakfast, if you would be so kind."

Eclipse suddenly exploded. "YOU WOKE ME UP WITH ALL YOUR DAMN RUCKUS, RYOSEI!"

He gasped and his eyes widened with surprise. "What did _I..._"

"STOP BREATHING!"

Shadow just smiled when he looked at her with a shocked, clueless look on his face. "Some breakfast, if you would."

"IT'S SO LOUD!" Eclipse was continuing.

"I-I-I'll..."

"AND OBNOXIOUS! YOU BREATHE SO OBNOXIOUSLY, RYOSEI!"

"I'll just..." He ran from the room, shutting the door behind him. Eclipse cracked up laughing. Shadow looked at her sideways.

"You freak."

"Shut up, whore!"

"Damn straight!"

"You're not damn straight."

"Hell yeah I am! I'm damn straight, slut. Karasu's not. Karasu is damn _crooked_."

"Damn gay freak."

"He's bisexual," Shadow reminded patiently, "and we love him all the more for it, right?"

"No, we hate him. Gay freak."

"Prejudiced bitch."

"Slimey hoe."

"Stankin' harlot!"

"Hooker!"

"Concubine!"

"Hustler!"

"Tramp!"

"Tart!"

"Bimbo!"

"Streetwalker!"

"Corner-stander!"

_"What?"_

Shadow glared. "I called you a corner-stander! As in, a skanky loose woman standin' on a street corner!"

"Shut up, you skank! Corner-stander is a stupid term!" Eclipse said. "I bet it's not even in the dictionary!"

"Well I can't very well check when I'm chained to the wall now can I!" She rattled her shackles to emphasize her point. Eclipse stuck out her tongue.

"Then we can just say I'm right."

"No we can't, you dirtbag! You're never right!"

"I'm always right!"

"Ha ha, that'd be like saying Hiei's a girl!"

"And you know he isn't, firsthand, don't you, you dirty whore?"

"Hand, and mouth." She stuck out her tongue, grinning.

"You dirty skank."

"Oh, come on. You'd do it to Kurama in the blink of an eye."

"No I wouldn't!"

"Oh, bull. I've seen the way you eye him up... He _is_ the legendary Youko, after all... I bet you two will have sex even before me and Hiei do."

"Bull shit."

"If you have sex this year, it'll be before me and Hiei."

"We just started going out like, not very long ago. Do you really think we're going to have sex sometime within the next..."

"Six months? Yes, I do. He's _Youko Kurama!_"

"He isn't. He has Youko in him..."

"You'll be lucky if Youko doesn't pop out of nowhere and seduce the shit out of you, screw you, and leave you with his child."

"I'm not having kids!"

"Are you on birth control? Do you know how likely it is Youko uses any sort of protection? He's a demon."

"Shut up, shut up, shut_ up_!" Eclipse screeched, thrashing around insanely. "I do **not** want to think about that!"

"What, about having kids, or about having sex with Youko?" She lowered her voice. "Youko is so damn sexy, Eclipse. Those golden eyes... His hair, so long and beautiful, like silk when you touch it... Those adorable ears... His body is so muscular... And he moves so easily... he's flexible... strong... And you know all about his tongue... I bet you know a little about his..." She cleared her throat. Eclipse thrashed her head from side to side.

"No! Nope, not a thing do I know about his _ahem_, not. at. **all**!"

"Oh!" Shadow chirped. "Okay! Not that I believe you or anything, but I don't want you getting all hot thinking about it... Then I'd have to deal with your freaky horniness and I'd be a little grossed out, y'know?"

"Oh, what, like I don't have to deal with you talking about your sex fantasies?"

"I've never told you about my sex fantasies! In fact, I don't even _have_ sex fantasies!"

"Oh, like hell! You can't live with Hiei for three years and not have _fantasies_ about him!"

"Oh can't you!"

"I bet you have some really nasty ones! Why else would you have handcuffs and pole dancer outfits in your bedroom?"

"What do you know about what's in my bedroom?"

"I snooped through it before!"

"Well I snooped through your bedroom before too!"

"WHEN!"

"When you were asleep! I snuck in, snooped through it, and left again! I found all that shit you printed off the internet!"

"What? I never printed anything off the internet!"

"Bull!"

"I hate you! Shut up!"

"I should tell Kurama about it."

"About _what?_ There's nothing to tell him!"

Luckily, Ryosei showed up just then to save both their asses from Kokuei, who was starting to get irritated with their bickering and shouting. He unchained them to let them eat, then tossed a paper plate on the floor in front of Kokuei with a steak on it. She frowned at him, but wolfed it down and continued glaring.

* * *

Was that an abrupt end to the chapter? ... I thought it was... but I didn't think of anything else to do with it... **The next chapter** was partially written at my best friend's house... It **will be posted... whenever the hell I feel like posting it!** YEEHA. I'm going to Eclipse's house tomorrow, so that means... I'll probably be back Wednesday... Which means... If I have a satisfactory number of reviews... you'll get a chapter then. Or, more likely, Thursday. 

**Oh! Another joyful thing:** I saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory again on Saturday (I love that movie so much... I think it might get even better the more you watch it). **But that's not what I was gonna say. I got the YYH DVD called "Yoko Kurama" which, all you DVD collectors know, is the Kurama vs. Karasu fight. I finally will get to see the uncut episodes.**


	4. Loyalty is a Virtue

**(August 18, 2005) YAY! 103 reviews on THREE chapters!  
**...I'm totally braindead right now. I've been reading hColleen's stories for the past two hours... The ones that will not be found on this site... And I'm kind of having a... stupid moment... I just feel like... sitting here and... staring off into space... with a stupid smile on my face, and my head lolling to one side cuz I don't want to use my neck muscles to hold it up... And... I think... I need to wander around the house in utter confusion for a whileuntil my brain returns to its regularly scheduled programming...  
**Okay... Let's see... So... Yeah... Hopefully you've noticed about this story... Each chapter title is a lesson that Shadow and or Eclipse does not adhere to in that particular chapter...

* * *

**

**CHAPTER FOUR  
**Lesson Four: Loyalty is a Virtue

Kurama was lounging around after lunch, half-watching some TV show and half-reading a book and half not doing either. Hiei had been outside, doing God knows what (he does that a lot lately), but came back in with half a shirt and covered in sweat. The redhead barely spared him a questioning glance when he came into the living room with a bottle of ice water and plopped down heavily onto the couch beside him. There was silence for a few minutes as Hiei chugged the water, then he glanced at Kurama.

"Whatcha doin'?" he asked.

"Nothing," the fox answered, amused by how childish Hiei had sounded.

"Oh." He sank back into the couch and there was more silence, then he asked, "So, how are you and Eclipse doing, anyways?"

Now he spared his friend a questioning glance. "Fine. Why do you ask?"

Hiei shrugged. "I figured you'd be driven insane by her. She's worse than Shadow, far as I can tell, and you, with all your calmness and intelligence, don't seem the type to have a split-personality psychotic slob of a girlfriend."

"Glad you think so highly of her, Hiei."

"Hey, well-"

"It's true, though. She is psychotic. But not so much that it's intolerable. Believe it or not, she's actually really sweet sometimes."

"Sometimes."

"What about you and Shadow?"

"What about us?"

"How is your relationship progressing?"

"It's progressing," Hiei said, smirking, and by his tone of voice it was obvious he meant sexually, and that he was very happy with it.

"Oh?" Kurama said, chuckling.

"I won't trouble you with details."

"They're not trouble."

"Fine, I'll rephrase it: 'The details are none of your business.'"

Kurama laughed a little.

"But... It is kind of nice to not have her around all the time," Hiei admitted.

"Really? Is she that annoying?"

"No, but... I've lived with her for years now... I've kind of gotten used to never having privacy or peace and quiet around her. But it's nice that now I can. I wish it were under different circumstances, of course. I'm not saying it's a good thing she was kidnapped by a gay vampire wannabe, but not having her appear out of nowhere every time I'm near the door, demanding I tell her where I'm going, what I'm doing, and when I'll be back, is kinda nice."

"I can't imagine living with Eclipse." He groaned. "I'd pull out my hair."

Hiei laughed. "Yeah, I can feel the love, fox."

"I love her, but... Well, part of it is Youko."

"Oh yeah. I forgot all about him."

_'Oh, thanks a lot, Hiei... Yeah, he loves me so much, Shuichi, I can tell.'_

_'Oh, shove it.'_

_'Yeah. You love me too. Jerk.'_ He went back to sulking.

"He constantly pesters me when I'm alone with her. You don't even want to know some of the things he tells me to do."

"I can imagine."

"Yes... Then there's her. If I lived with her... She'd have to burn off her psychotic habits elsewhere, because if she was around me 24/7 bouncing off the walls, I'd probably _let_ Youko chain her up and do all kinds of weird things to her, just so I could have some time alone."

Hiei snickered. "God, you psycho."

"What?"

"So is there anything you like about her?"

"Of course there is. I said I love her, didn't I?"

"Yes. So why?"

"She's intelligent. Pretty. Funny. Strong. Outspoken."

"Outspoken," Hiei repeated, snickering. "Damn straight she is."

"Sometimes it's bad... We were walking together once on the street, and there were a few little boys... They came running up from behind us, and one of them ran into her accidentally. He was probably twelve or so, but he was heavy, y'know? So I managed to keep her from killing him, but she screamed obseneties and something like, 'I hope you get hit by a car! But it would probably do more damage to the car, you fat little freak! Respect your god-damned elders!'"

"Shadow's done worse."

"God. Dare I ask?"

"Pull a knife and threaten some innocent bystander for breathing too loud... I think he sneezed or something... She exploded on him and told him how exactly she would like to carve out his brain with that knife, and went into detail of how the brains would look when she'd butchered them and flung them all over the street... How his flesh would look after she'd chopped it up..."

"For _sneezing!_"

"Yep."

"Wow, that _is_ awful."

"Then there's her list of foreign obseneties, the weasels, the doom..."

"Eclipse teleports..."

"Shadow melted... once..."

"Niiice..."

"She's totally obsessed with sex."

"That's not so bad, is it?"

"Sometimes. Okay, so it's not bad very often. But sometimes it's bad. She tends to be a little disloyal."

"Shadow? My God. How so?"

"She hits on every attractive guy she sees. She touches them, and seduces them if they have something she wants."

"Like what?"

"Money. Clothes. Jewelry. Shiny things. She seduced the crap out of this bouncer at a rave she wanted to get into..."

"She went to a rave?"

"Well she was only going so she could dance like a skank in public. She's underage and wasn't on the guest list, so she had to seduce him.. Once he got over his drooling, he found her and tossed her out on her ass... But she'd got his wallet, so she wasn't totally bummed."

"When was this?"

Hiei shrugged. "It was kind of funny, actually."

They were both quiet for a moment, then Kurama chuckled, shaking his head. Hiei looked at him curiously. "What?"

"I never imagined I'd ever be in this situation."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm talking to you, Hiei, about our relationships. The fact that you're in a relationship is the first odd thing."

"Thanks, fox."

"Sorry. The fact that we're discussing it, you know, like normal humans might. That's the second odd thing."

"You being in a relationship is weird too," Hiei pointed out, almost accusingly.

"Yes, it is."

"You being in a relationship with _Eclipse_ is _insane_, not weird."

"I could say the same about you and Shadow. But I think you two are a great couple."

"Why? Neither of us really understands the other-"

"There is no understanding Shadow. Don't blame yourself."

"She acts like she's two years old, and according to her, I act like a 'stuffy old man' sometimes."

"I haven't seen you act like a stuffy old man in months!" Kurama protested.

"You don't live with me."

"...You have a point. Why does she say that?"

Hiei shrugged. "Because I'm not always as energetic as she is. And because I need alone time sometimes."

"Doesn't she ever need to be alone?"

"Yeah... Not very often, though, and it never seems to coincide with the times I want to be alone. And when she wants to be alone, I know about it. Either she just kind of... vanishes... or she explodes on me when I walk into the room."

Kurama chuckled. "But even with all these problems, would you rather live alone than stay here with her?"

"No," Hiei admitted with a sigh. "And she's dead set on going to America with you and Eclipse when you guys leave, so I guess I'm going to America as well."

"I don't know how well that would work, though," Kurama said. "We have an American family to stay with. Eclipse and I have started exchanging emails with the oldest boy... He seems nice. But I doubt the family would want to board you and Shadow. Especially when they met her."

"Then we'll find a hotel or something. She always finds a way to get what she wants, if she tries hard enough."

"I guess you're going to America, then." He smiled. "It's probably a good thing. I would hate to have to leave you behind with only Yusuke and Kuwabara."

"Oh, yeah, that'd be fun," Hiei muttered sarcastically. He sighed, and after a pause said, "I'm hungry."

"You missed lunch," Kurama informed him helpfully.

"Damn. Any leftovers?"

"Yusuke stayed for lunch."

"That's a no. And I don't suppose you'd be so kind as to make me something, would you? I'm awfully tired from training all those hours this morning... If I strain myself too much more on an empty stomach, I might get faint."

Kurama tried to suppress laughter, giving Hiei something of a quizzical look, but in the end laughter won out. After a few seconds, he calmed down. "Well we can't have you getting faint from the terrible strain of making yourself lunch, now can we?"

"Definitely not," the smaller demon agreed.

"I think you're taking advantage of my kindness, Hiei," Kurama said, standing up. The fire demon instantly flopped down onto his side on the couch where Kurama had just been laying.

"No way, I'm definitely on the edge of consciousness," he said, yawning. The redhead just snorted.

"If I make you lunch and find you asleep when I get back here, your lunch will be on your face."

Hiei just dismissed him with a wave and a grin.

_**

* * *

**_

Shadow and Eclipse, meanwhile, were still chained to the wall in the dungeon of Karasu's freaky castle-lookin' thingy.

"Hey Eclipse..."

"Yes, Whore?"

"Thanks."

There was a pause. "What did you want?"

"... How are you and Kurama doing?"

"Me and Kurama? Fine... Why?"

"Oohhh, no reason, no reason atall!"

Eclipse narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "... Are you going to start interrogating me on my sex life again?"

"Again! When did I ever before?"

"When you were saying I want to suck him off and that I have wild, hot sex fantasies about him!"

"Oh... I don't think I ever said 'wild, hot' ones... Are they hot and wild?"

"They're wild and hot."

"WEH! But you said you didn't even have them!"

Eclipse eyes widened, then narrowed and darted around suspiciously. "I _don't_."

"Liar."

"What? Fine, if I have wild sex fantasies about Kurama, you have wild sex fantasies about Hiei!" She stuck out her tongue like that was some great victory.

"I actually get to _live_ some of _mine_, you loser!"

"Ew! And I'm not a loser! I've never lost anything!"

"Your _mind,_ for one!"

"Loser."

"I've never lost anything! Except my mind... and my virginity."

"YOU WHAT!"

"My _MOUTH'S_ virginity! Not my virginity's virginity!"

"Ew, you freak with an impure mouth!"

"I like having an impure mouth, I'll have you know."

"That's gross. I don't want to know about your disgusting cock sucking adventures in the bedroom."

"What about the ones _outside_ the bedroom?"

Eclipse eyes widened. "Ew! I'm never going in your house again! Where the hell do you do that shit!"

"ON THE FUCKIN' DINING ROOM TABLE!"

Eclipse screamed overdramatically and went limp in her shackles. Shadow started dancing.

"I killed her, I killed her, I killed her, oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah."

"Shut up and die, you dirty whore!"

"I'm not dirty!"

"Fine, you _dumb_ whore!"

"I'm not--Well..."

"HA! Loser!"

Shadow sighed. "I miss Hiei."

Eclipse sighed. "I miss Kurama."

"I'm gonna get out of here and I'm not gonna let go of him for two weeks."

"I'm gonna get out of here and I'm gonna... take a shower."

Shadow paused. "Ooh. That sounds good..." She grinned sinisterly. Eclipse glared.

"I'm gonna take my shower _alone_."

"Why?"

"Because... um... Kurama and I aren't to the... nudity part of our relationship."

"Loser."

"We've gone through this. I've never lost anything but my mind!"

"How does Kurama deal with you, anyways!" Shadow asked. "You're such a loser."

"He loves me, that's how! How does _Hiei_ deal with _you?_"

"What's there to deal with? I'm a great person and we get along like the bestest buds."

"Oh, yeah, you get along just like that. From what I've seen, you're either touching each other in some way or you want nothing to do with each other."

"That's total shit."

"What? You have mood swings like, 'I love you Hiei' to 'GET AWAY AND LEAVE MY HOUSE AND FALL OFF A CLIFF AND DIE!'"

"I do not! I have never told Hiei to die! If he died, I'd die! But not before killing whoever was responsible."

"What if Kurama was responsible?"

"I'd kill him, then you could kill me for killing him and then you'd kill yourself because I kill him cuz he killed Hiei."

"Lots of death. That's nice."

"So, Eclipse... What's your favorite thing about Kurama?"

"My favorite?"

"We all know you don't care about his intelligence..."

"Yes I do! If he was some retard, like Hiei, I wouldn't want anything to do with him!"

"Hiei's not a retard, I totally resent that!"

"Hiei's more retarded than my beautiful Kurama!"

"Hiei's HOW OLD in comparison with your 'beautiful Kurama'? The guy hasn't even got a century in! Of course Kurama's bound to know more, he's got _ten!_"

"No he doesn't! You make him sound like an old man!"

"He **is** an old man," Shadow stated dryly. "He's like, a thousand!"

"No he's--Oh wait... Yes, he is." She looked annoyed for a moment, then thrashed angrily towards Shadow. "Well he doesn't LOOK it!"

"Oh, yes, yes, he's a beautiful old geezer, that's for certain."

"Well what about Hiei! He looks like a kid!"

"He does not! He looks like he's around our age! And what does _Kurama_ look like, anyways? He looks like a kid, too!"

"At least he's not a _midget!_"

"HIEI'S NOT A MIDGET! HE'S THE SAME FREAKIN' HIEGHT AS YOU! Are you calling _yourself_ a midget?"

"I'm a _girl_. What excuse does _Hiei_ have for his midgety shortness?"

"Poor nutrition as a child. And heredity."

"Heredity!"

"Look at Yukina! She's shorter than him, so it _must_ run in the family! Besides, it's not like it effects his life."

"It makes him midgety short!"

"I don't care. I like his height. And his goofy hair." She giggled. "It's all soft and pretty... Like a puppy. And his eyes... That beautiful shade of red..." A contented sigh escaped her as she gazed at some far-off point that no one else could see. Eclipse eyed her like she was standing there talking about how adorable protists are.

"Uh... yeah, okay... Freak."

Shadow snapped out of her reverie and glared. "What? Like you don't think of Kurama's hair and eyes? They're beautiful!"

"Whose! Hiei's or Kurama's?"

"Both!"

"I'll have you know that if I ever catch you thinking about Kurama's beauty again, I'll knock you out cold! You have a boyfriend, and it's _not_ my Kurama!"

"Well good thing you can't read my mind, cuz let me tell you, I think about him all the freakin' time!"

Eclipse let out an indignant huff.

"Yeah! I secretly fantasize about fucking your boyfriend, Eclipse!" Shadow said angrily. "About running my fingers through his long, soft, silky hair! Gazing into his emerald eyes and seeing them filled with lust for me, me, me! Not you, you, you!"

"Well fine! Then I fantasize about Hiei! And his muscles! I just _dream_ about touching his strong, toned chest! About feeling him push me down on YOUR bed and kiss me!"

Shadow screamed and thrashed dangerously, practically dislocating her arms. "I dream about Youko, and how sexy he is! How he could use those vines to tie me down on the bed and have his way with my body! Whip me so I scream! Oh, Youko, _Youko!_ Gods, yes! Yes! Ahhh!"

Now it was Eclipse's turn to scream and fling herself around. "THAT'S SO SICK!"

"And he'd run his tongue up from my stomach to my mouth, kiss me with all the passion in the world, and drive his hard-"

"I GOT BETTER! I dream of Hiei _and_ Kurama! TOGETHER!"

"You! You have a homosexual fetish, you freak!"

"Yeah! Oh, boy, I just long to see those two writhing together in bed, naked, moaning and--"

"Well I dream about Youko and--"

The door flew open and slammed into the wall. Shadow jumped and swung her head around to look at the door. Smiling, she chirped happily in greeting, "Karasu!"

"What the hell's going on in here? I've heard a lot of screaming!"

"You dream of Youko and _KARASU?_" Eclipse questioned, horrified.

Shadow, however, had already dismissed and forgotten their entire conversation. Instead, she smiled sweetly at the crow. "Karasu, darling, come here please."

He looked at her suspiciously, then at Kokuei, who could easily reach him if he approached the girl. Shadow noticed.

"Oh, she's not gonna hurt you. She actually likes you, in fact."

The dog was actually asleep. Or at least, rather looked like it. Shadow knew she wasn't.

"She likes me!"

"Yes. But that doesn't matter, Karasu." She smiled. "Come here. Please? Unchain me."

He walked over to her, but didn't touch her shackles. "Why should I unchain you?"

"Because..." she purred, keeping her eyes locked with his while her mind raced for some halfway acceptable reason. "I don't need to be chained up, dear. I'll behave myself if you let me out of these wretched shackles."

"How do I know you're not trying to trick me? You tricked Ryosei."

"Karasu! Your lack of trust in me is disheartening... I think I'm going to cry..." She sniffled, closing her eyes and dropping her head. To his surprise, she really _did_ start crying.

"What are you crying about!" he asked, startled.

"You don't trust me! How long have I known you, and you still don't trust me!"

"It's not you... it's the situation! You're bound to try to escape... I mean..."

"I already tried that once! It didn't work! Why would I try again!" She sniffled. "I just want you to trust me... to love me..."

Karasu moved his mouth wordlessly for a few seconds before he sighed and stepped forward, unlocking her shackles and freeing her. She flung her arms around him.

"Thank you! You trust me!"

"I--mmph!" His words were cut off when she kissed him. Eclipse, who had been gaping with saucer-sized eyed the entire time anyways, let out a shriek at this.

"YOU'RE KISSING KARASU!"

Shadow ignored her as she turned and pushed Karasu against the wall, still not parting their lips and tongues.

"I THINK YOU REALLY FANTASIZE ABOUT _KARASU,_ NOT KURAMA!"

Kokuei sat up and blinked placidly at the kissing pair. She let out one sharp bark, and a second later, Shadow slowly pulled back from the crow.

"I need to talk to you," she panted.

"Shall we go to my chambers?"

"Whatever works."

"DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE MY SIGHT, SHADOW JAGANSHI! I'LL BE FORCED TO TELL HIEI YOU HAD SEX WITH KARASU IF YOU LEAVE FOR HIS BEDROOM RIGHT AFTER DOING THAT! RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!"

Kokuei started barking. Shadow rounded on her friend. "Kokuei has a point! Keep your nose out of my business!"

The dog stopped abruptly. _That's not what I said..._ she thought dejectedly. Shadow flashed her a grin that clearly stated, "I know that, but since Eclipse didn't, think of it as being for the benefit of our cause. What's our cause, you ask? Distracting Karasu from Kurama, of course. So I'm gonna take him upstairs and distract him a bit."

Yes, she said all of that in a grin. She's just that good.

Karasu led her out of the dungeon and back up to his chambers. They sat on the bed and she smiled at him.

"So... What purpose could you possibly have for demanding Kurama comes alone tomorrow night?"

"...I just want to talk to him, like a reasonable adult. But whenever that little rat Hiei is around, he gets all pissed and defensive when I get _near_ Kurama."

"That, my dear crow, is because Hiei doesn't trust you."

"I know. So I have to talk to him... alone..."

Shadow stared. "You kidnapped us just so you could TALK to him!"

"No... I kidnapped you so I would have an advantage for him to consider when I talk to him."

"...Still trying to get him in bed with you, huh?"

He frowned.

"Honestly, Karasu. Go back to Makai for a while. There are beautiful people all over the place there. I've seen all kinds of them."

"But..."

"None as beautiful as Kurama, right? Didn't we already go through this?"

He sighed. "I think so."

"So, when Kurama comes tomorrow night, what are you going to do?"

"Talk to him."

"About?"

"About... How much I love him?"

"No. About how important his happiness is to you."

"His happiness? But I..."

"You want him to be happy, don't you?"

"To a degree, yes, of course I do!"

"To a degree!"

"I want him to be happy with _me!"_

Shadow sighed and fell back on the bed, flinging her arms out to the sides.

"What?" Karasu asked. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong, Karasu. It's just... You have to move past Kurama! I know you think you can't, but you can. Just try."

"Move past him to where!"

"To someone else. Why not Ryosei? He may not be as good as Kurama, but I think he's a very nice kid. He'd be a nice replacement, wouldn't he?"

"Ryosei isn't... He's... Well, I mean..."

"I get it; you can't love him because he's weak, he's probably not a masochist, and he's not Kurama."

"Well... yeah."

"Then just use him for a sex for a while and move on to the next guy! Come on, Karasu, you're above this simpering emotional shit!"

"So what are you saying _now?_ I shouldn't care about Kurama's emotions? I should just take him whether he likes it or not? That's what I would have done before, so why shouldn't I now? You have a point, Shadow."

The girl's eyes widened. "I seem to be giving mixed messages." She sat up and moved onto Karasu's lap. "Look here. I want you to forget all about Kurama. Take him completely out of the equation. Kurama does not exist."

"But..."

"**Kurama does not exist.** And since he does not exist, you're going to fuck Ryosei to your heart's delight, then go to Makai, find the next elegable beauty, and fuck _him_ to your heart's delight. Or, if you find it more appealing to kill him, then kill him. But the point is, I want Kurama gone from your equations. Never consider him again. He doesn't exist."

"Yeah... But..." His hands slid down her thighs and back up, his eyes locked on some point on the bed off to the side as he thought quietly. She let him think, straddling his lap, her arms around his neck.

She's such an unloyal whore.

"I have a lot to think about... Again," Karasu muttered. He looked at her. "Why are you being so nice?"

"Why? Because you're my friend, aren't you?"

"...I guess... I've never had friends."

Shadow smiled. "Most demons don't. But... Everyone should have friends. Even you." Her gentle smile turned into a big, goofy grin. After all, she can't be serious for more than two seconds. It's a major health hazard for her.

"If you say so." He laid back on the bed. They were quiet for a minute, then he looked up at her. "Shadow...?"

"Yes?"

"Will you stay with me tonight?"

"_What!_ You mean sleep with you? Or have _sex_ with you?"

"You've already told me you won't have sex with me. I just want you to sleep with me."

"Um... Well... Er, as uh... _tempting_ as it is... I really don't think I should... I mean... I can only be a disloyal whore to a certain degree... and 180 is past that degree. See what I'm saying?"

"I'm not asking anything more than that you stay with me..."

"I have a boyfriend. A boyfriend who actually really dislikes you. And I have to be loyal to him. I love him. It'd just be wrong for me to sleep with you."

"But he won't find out, will he?"

Shadow made incoherent noises then finally managed, "He'd find out, yes. I wouldn't have to tell him, but he would find out."

Karasu looked away, seeming hurt. Shadow laid down on him.

"Don't take offense, Karasu. You're my friend, but Hiei hates you, and for me to sleep with you would really hurt him. I mean, for me to purposefully sleep with you, while I'm currently your hostage, you know? That would make it worse. So, if you want to get mad, get mad, but I can only be nice to you to a certain degree."

"No, I understand," he said. "It's probably better you're not that disloyal. It'd end up getting me killed. I should never have asked."

"Damn straight." She kissed his forehead gently and smiled. "So, are you gonna just dump me back in the dungeon?"

"You want to eat dinner with me?"

She looked at him quizzically. "Uh... sure, why not."

"I'll have Ryosei make something good. Then I'll put you back downstairs, but you won't have to be chained up. How does that sound?"

"Excellent." She smiled.

* * *

**One more chapter left. **

**And also, if you hadn't noticed,this story, this chapter in particular, is kind of... I dunno... It's an attempt to establish the relationships between the two happy couples... Y'know? To show that not everything is hunky-dory all the time... Not that you all thought it was...**

**Just to say... Um... You guys are probably all gonna be po'ed at the end of this story... Then again, you might like it... Or, you might not... We'll see... I'll update again... Let's see, it's Thursday... We'll say Monday or Tuesday, whichever works best for me. :)**


	5. Silence is Golden

**(August 21, 2005)  
131 reviews.** I _told_ you 200 was too ambitious for a five-chapter story... Unless I get 69 reviews on this chapter... Which I doubt... seriously... 69... teeheehee...  
Yes, I decided to update a day early. I wasn't getting very many reviews anymore, so I was bored and I want to get some feedback on this chapter...The title of this chapter doesn't really fit in with the rest of them, either... But I couldn't really come up with anything from this chapter that would be like that... Oh well.  
Oh yeah, while we're on the subject (actually, we're totally no where near the subject), something in this chapter is majorly gonna PO a lot of people... XD Yay for po'ed fans! I'll say no more. But don't say I didn't warn you.

Oh yeah... There's an amusing INTENTIONAL "typo" in this chapter... See if you can catch it...

* * *

**CHAPTER FIVE  
**Lesson Five: Silence is Golden

The second day of Shadow and Eclipse's captivity passed uneventfully. Shadow attempted to counsel Karasu again, then ended up having to counsel Ryosei, too, because as it turns out, he really likes Karasu and apparently the cold-hearted crow doesn't return his feelings. Wonder why? But that's okay, because Karasu had no idea about Ryosei's feelings. That only would have made it worse.

In the world of Hiei and Kurama, the fox was rather nervous about going alone. Hiei subtly reminded him he was willing to go along ("Then don't go alone! I'll go too; I already said this four hundred times!"). Eventually, Kurama agreed.

"You can come... But I'm sure the second Karasu sees you, he'll tell you to get lost. And if he does... I guess you should go."

"Then what's the point of me coming along?" the fire demon pointed out dryly.

"It doesn't matter. We should leave soon if we're going to get there on time. It's an hour of driving, at least."

Hiei nodded, grabbing his sword. Kurama glanced at it and said nothing, heading out the door instead.

_**

* * *

**_

Karasu came down to the dungeon around 11 that night. Shadow greeted him with a hug that practically broke his ribs.

"Aren't you excited!" she asked, bouncing from one foot to the other and clapping her hands together. "In a little bit, you get to get rid of us!"

"Yes. I'm excited. But... Unfortunately, I have to chain you up again."

"What? Why?"

"Just to maintain my advantage. I can't have you running off when I open the door, now can I? Not that you will..."

"No, I understand. It's okay," she sighed melodramatically. "Chain me up..." She walked over to the wall and let him lock the shackles around her wrists and and ankles again.

Eclipse was asleep. She'd been asleep all day. It was like, after being traumatized to death by seeing Shadow and Karasu kiss, she'd fallen asleep and probably was erasing the memory by dreaming about pink bunnies and rays of yellow sunshine.

_**

* * *

**_

Kurama and Hiei arrived at the designated meeting point at 11:59. Both of them got out of the car, on guard and ready for anything. All they got, though, was Ryosei. He just strolled right on out of the forest that bordered the in-the-middle-of-nowhere back road.

"Kurama," he said, smiling and looking at the fox. Then he looked at Hiei, but still spoke to the redhead, "Didn't I tell you to come alone?"

"Where is Karasu?" Kurama asked coldly. Ryosei looked up, startled.

"You know?"

"It wasn't that hard to figure out. Not with your little mistakes on the phone. That's why I brought Hiei."

He faintly heard Hiei repeat "brought" in a scoffing tone behind him.

"Well... I'm sorry, but Karasu-sama will not allow Hiei to accompany you. He will have to stay here. I cannot guarantee their safety, or his, if he comes along."

Hiei snorted. _My safety is no problem, and I hardly believe Shadow's is, either. She **owns** that damn crow._ But out loud he said, "I'll stay with the car, fox. Go ahead."

Kurama nodded, but he knew Hiei would be watching. Turning to Ryosei, he said, "Lead the way."

The second the two were out of sight, Hiei pulled the headband off his Jagan and allowed his normal eyes to shut as he concentrated on the images from the third eye.

Kurama followed after Ryosei through the woods for over twenty minutes. The half-demon boy was clearly in no hurry to get to where they were going, and the fox was starting to get irritated.

"Where are you taking me?" he asked finally. Ryosei glanced over his shoulder at the ire teen.

"To where your girlfriend is being held. Don't you trust me?"

A quiet growl answered. Frustrated, more than angry. Ryosei smiled.

"We're almost there. Two more minutes, tops."

_**

* * *

**_

Karasu leaned against the wall just inside the stronghold type thingy he'd conveniently pulled out of a plothole. When Ryosei came into sight with Kurama in tow, he smiled. The redhead was on guard the second he saw the crow.

"Hello, Kurama," Karasu purred happily.

"Karasu," he greeted in a semi-polite voice.

"He brought Hiei along," Ryosei said. "I made him stay back there."

"Good," Karasu said.

"Where is Eclipse?" Kurama asked.

"You'll be taken to her once I've gotten what I want."

"Which is?" Duh.

"You."

"No," Kurama growled. "You won't get me. You won't get _anything_ from me until I have the girls back."

Karasu's smile faltered and he suppressed a sigh. "You may see them. But I will not release her until I've got what I want. Come with me, then. Ryosei, you aren't needed for this."

"Yessir."

The crow led Kurama down to the dungeons and paused outside the metal door behind which Shadow, Eclipse, and Kokuei were chained to the wall.

"Stay right there. You may _see_ them, but that is it. Try anything tricky and I will hurt them all."

Kurama's glare intensified. Karasu smiled and opened the door. Inside, both girls were sleeping, and Kokuei was wide awake and watching the door, as if she knew what was going on. She probably did. The second the door opened, she stood and walked to stand in front of the snoozing girls protectively, baring her teeth without a sound. Karasu hesitated.

"Call the dog off, Kurama."

_Been having some problems with Kokuei, have we?_ Mildly amused by the thought, he spoke her name firmly and she glanced at him, then reluctantly slunk away from Shadow and Eclipse. Karasu approached Shadow and looked at her fondly, brushing a few strands of hair behind her ear. He tipped her head up and kissed her.

Red eyes bolted open and she turned her head sharply away. "Jeesh! You sure know how to wake a girl up!"

"Kurama's here," the crow said quietly. Shadow peered past the crow and smiled, then her face fell.

"No Hiei? HIIIIIEIIIII! I want Hiei!"

Eclipse's head snapped up and she looked around tiredly. "Food?"

"HIEI ISN'T FOOD! HE'S MY BABY!" Shadow screamed, appalled.

Karasu smiled and straightened Eclipse's shirt, which had slipped off to one side to reveal her shoulder and bra strap. She glanced at him with eyes half-lidded with sleep. "Who're you?"

Shadow, meanwhile, had taken up a chant. "Hiei, Hiei, Hiei, Hiei!"

"Hiei?" Eclipse peered at Karasu with narrowed eyes. "Did you change your hairstyle? And you _grew!_"

"Eclipse!" Kurama snapped. Her eyes widened.

"I hear Kurama!" She looked around. "I _SEE_ Kurama! KURAMA! MY BABY CAME TO SAVE ME!"

Karasu smirked and left the cell to stand in the hall with Kurama. "You see? They're fine."

"Hiei, Hiei, Hiei, Hiei..."

"KURAMAKURAMAKURAMAKURAMA!"

"Let them go," Kurama said. "You surely are above this, Karasu."

"Kurama... I couldn't think of any other way. You won't be with me voluntarily..."

"HEY!" Shadow snapped, cutting off in the middle of a 'Hiei'. "I thought you wanted to get OVER him! What did all my counseling do!"

"What do you want?" Kurama asked coldly. "My life? My body?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Karasu asked. "I want _you._ I want you to be mine. Just once, at least. Have sex with me. Please."

"No."

"You JERK! **DON'T TOUCH MY FOX!**" Eclipse exploded.

"WHAT'S ANY OF THIS GOT TO DO WITH ME!" Shadow screamed. "LET ME AND KOKUEI GO HOME! I WANT HIEI! HIEIHIEIHIEI!"

"Your concern for your friends is evident," Eclipse said, frowning.

"HieiHieiHiei--Shut up. I want Hiei. HieiHieiHiei..."

"Karasu wants to have sex with Kurama. Karasu is a psycho. We should be CONCERNED by that! He's got me hostage! He might rape Kurama! Kurama might do something stupid since he loves me so much!"

"HieiHieiHiei--Kurama? Stupid? Ha!--HieiHieiHiei..."

"Kurama, please," Karasu murmured, stepping closer. "Please, just give me a chance. You may find out I'm not all that bad."

"Doubtful. Release them."

"If I release all three of them, will you have sex with me?"

Kurama's eyes narrowed. "No."

"Then they'll stay here and rot," the crow said simply. "You can take Hiei and run along home."

"Hiei? HieiHieiHiei?" Shadow said questioningly.

"I won't leave them," the fox insisted.

"Then you're in quite a fix."

Kokuei snarled deep in her throat. Other than that, there was silence. Shadow's 'Hiei' chant had turned into repeatedly moving her lips to his name without actually saying it. Kurama's mind was racing. Karasu waited patiently for the fox to reach a decision. In his mind, he only had one option.

The redhead sighed slightly, running his hand through his hair--something he never did, Hiei noted absently. He ran his fingers across his mouth to wipe away the sweat accumulating on his upper lip. Slowly, he turned to face Karasu, licking his dry lips, seeming nervous. Quickly, he closed the distance between himself and his enemy, and kissed him.

Eclipse screamed like she'd just had a steak rammed through her heart. Shadow's lips stopped moving and her jaw dropped with surprise.

Outside, Hiei's eyes snapped open wide. _THIS is his plan?_ he thought with horror. He could tell, even in the not-quite-clear vision his Jagan showed him, that Kurama had hadan idea. But... _The stupid fox's great and wonderful plan is to kiss the damn crow!_ No. There had to be something else.

Kurama, meanwhile, was holding Karasu's body against his, one hand tangling in the demon's silky locks as he pulled his mouth closer, his tongue pushing far into the crow's mouth. Karasu was very willing to let the great Youko Kurama dominate him, at least for now. He tugged open Kurama's shirt as his hips ground into the fox's. His hands slid over the fox's bared chest, down to his belt, and he suddenly froze. Kurama pulled away, out of breath, with a golden glint in his narrowed eyes.

Zillions of Kurama fangirls scream in unison and bombard me with fiery, sharp objects of death.

"Y-you..." Karasu stuttered. His eyes were wide and slightly unfocused. "You betrayed me!" His body was trembling with the effort of staying on his feet. He collapsed, eyes closed. Shadow looked from the crow to the fox.

"Is he dead?"

Kurama shook his head. "I don't think so."

"You don't _think_ so! What did you do?"

"I forced him to swallow a seed."

"A seed?" Shadow said flatly, sounding unimpressed. "What's he, like, gonna get watermelon vines growing out his ears now?"

"It was the seed of the _eimin no shokubutsu_."

"'Plant of eternal sleep'? So in other words, you killed him," Shadow continued flatly.

"The plant gets its name because the leaves are the main ingredient in a very powerful sedative. It induces a sleep so deep the heart barely beats."

"YOU ONLY SEDATED HIM! **KILL** THE BASTARD!" Eclipse shrieked, thrashing around like a nutjob.

"The leaves on their own are fatally poisonous to most demons."

"But that was a seed, not the leaves," Shadow pointed out.

"Exactly. I doubt he'll die, but he will be asleep for quite a long time, and probably be quite weak when he wakes up." He glanced at Hiei, who had appeared sometime during his explanation. The fire demon glanced at Karasu and shook his head.

"You should've killed him," he sighed. Shadow perked up. Hiei was out of her line of sight, but she could hear his voice.

"Hiei?" she said hopefully. "HieiHieiHiei?"

Kurama knelt and searched Karasu's pockets for the key to the girls' shackles. Hiei walked into the dungeon and Shadow went into fits.

"HIEIHIEIHIEI! I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU!"

"I love you too," he said, reaching up and grabbing the chains that held both his girlfriend's wrists. The metal went orange, then red, and Hiei broke the chains. Shadow squealed and flung her arms around him.

"I love you!"

"Yeah, but you're still chained to the wall..."

"My ankles? Those shackles always opened when he kicked them."

Hiei kicked them and they popped open. Shadow flung her legs around his middle and hugged him so tight it had to hurt. Then she dropped off him and stepped back just enough that she could smash her mouth against his and kiss him fervently.

Kurama unchained Eclipse and got a tight hug, but she only kissed his cheek.

"Sorry if I don't kiss you after your mouth was on that freak."

"It's okay," he said, smiling. "That's perfectly understandable. I can't say it was one of the most pleasant experiences of my life..." He looked down when something nudged his leg. It was Kokuei. She looked up at him pathetically with her two-tone eyes and he had to chuckle.

"I didn't forget you," he said, bending and unlocking her heavy metal collar. He grabbed it before it fell and tossed it towards the corner of the room. The loud CLANG that resulted made Shadow jump, thus disentangling her and Hiei's mouths. Hiei cast a sour glance at the collar, then at Kurama, who was smiling at him with Eclipse clinging to his sleeve and peering around from behind him. Kokuei was standing there panting and looking happy.

"Button your shirt," the fire demon snapped at Kurama. Kokuei romped over and jumped on Hiei, licking his cheek. She dropped down to her feet and barked happily, prancing around until he petted her.

"What now?" Eclipse asked.

"Where's Ryosei?" Shadow asked, glancing around. "Apparently, he's the only one able to take off our collars."

"Ryosei?"

"The cute guy with the silver eyes? Karasu's pawn? The dude who actually committed the act of kidnapping us? He's probably upstairs."

"Then let's go," Kurama said.

As they left the dungeon, Eclipse glared at Karasu's unconscious body, still clutching Kurama's sleeve. She kicked him right in the ribs. "Jerk! That's for kidnapping me!" Then she paused, making Kurama stop as well. Then she kicked him again. "That's for kissing Shadow!"

Hiei's eyes darted to Shadow, widening.

Eclipse then stomped on Karasu, right between his shoulder blades. "That's for chaining me to a wall!" She kicked his other side. "That's for daring to obsess over Kurama worse than most drooling fanatics!" Another kick. "That's for... uh... Just cuz I felt like it! I hate you!" She jumped up in the air to slam both feet down on his back, but Kurama caught her in mid-air with two arms around her middle.

"WHY ARE YOU PROTECTING HIM?"

"I'm protecting _you._ From Shadow."

Shadow made to lunge at Eclipse anyways, but Hiei grabbed her around the middle. "What was that Eclipse said about Karasu kissing you?" The girl stopped struggling instantly.

"I'm so, so, so, so sorry, Hiei. I'll make it up to you. I promise. I love you."

He growled slightly with annoyance. She whimpered.

"Please? I'm sorry."

Kurama cleared his throat. "I know this is important, but it's a bad place. Work it out at home. Right now, I just want to get out of here."

Hiei sighed and started walking towards the stairs. Shadow got watery eyes and grabbed Kurama. "He hates me now!"

"He doesn't hate you. You just need to work on your loyalty." He set Eclipse down and started following Hiei.

"I'm loyal!" Shadow whined, trailing along beside him.

Eclipse and Hiei snorted. Even Kokuei sneezed, glanced at her, then trotted up to walk alongside Hiei.

"You know, you had a chance to deny it," Eclipse said. "You just totally missed it. When I said he kissed you, you could have insisted it was against your will. I did say _he kissed you_, not _you kissed him_."

"Well it's a bit late for that now, isn't it? And I wasn't going to lie to him! Are you implying I should lie to my boyfriend? I would never do that!"

"If I hadn't mentioned it, you never would have told him," Eclispe said.

"Yeah, _so?_"

"That's not lying?"

"No! It's called 'plausible deniability'!"

"No it isn't, stupid! What, if you never say it it's like it never happened?"

"Ex_actly_!"

"You are so stupid. I can't see why Hiei stays with you."

Hiei glanced back at them and looked forward again just as fast. Shadow glared at Eclipse.

"So what are we _now_? Eclipse the Counselor? Eclipse the Wise?"

They started up the stairs, the two girls still bickering. Finally, Kurama got tired of it. He smacked his hands over their mouths.

"Neither of you is aiding the situation."

"Eclipse started it!"

"I did not!"

They lunged at each other, only to find themselves suspended in the air by strong vines coming out of Kurama's sleeves. Neither of them was going anywhere.

"How the heck did you two manage to stay in the same room for two and a half days!"

"Shadow was with _Karasu_ most of the time!"

"I was not! You were ASLEEP for a whole fucking day! What do you know!"

"A lot more than you think!"

"For YOUR information, little miss know-it-all, I was only around Karasu so much because I was _trying_ to get him to forget about _your_ boyfriend!"

"By making him focus on YOU?"

"NO! By talking to him!"

"And kissing him!"

"I only kissed him, like, twice or something!"

"Twice is more than none!"

"No shit!"

"Well you have a boyfriend! You shouldn't have kissed him at all!"

"I know that! And for your information _AGAIN_, Karasu _asked me_ to sleep with him last night, but you fuckin' know what? I didn't! Because I can only expect Hiei to forgive me to a certain extent, and I can only betray him to a certain extent! And I know I shouldn't have even touched Karasu, but he's my friend, and..." She sighed. "No use making excuses. Hiei's gonna hate me for a week or two after this anyways, no matter how many excuses I make." Her shoulders slumped where she hung and she became the picture of misery. Kurama would have let her down from the vines, but he had a feeling she would have fallen back down the stairs because she didn't want to support herself on her legs anymore.

Hiei glanced at her, then looked down, pausing before he continued forward. Kurama let Eclipse down.

"Jeez. This must be serious," she muttered.

They came around the last turn and stopped dead. Ryosei was standing there, and he looked most unhappy.

"Where's Karasu-sama?" he asked, eyes widening. "What did you do to him?"

Shadow perked up and started struggling. "Let me handle this. Get me out of these stupid flowers!"

Kurama let her go and she walked up to Ryosei, putting one hand on his shoulder and drawing close to him, whispering in his ear, "This is your chance to get closer to him. He's downstairs. Kurama used some kind of sedative on him... He'll be out for a while. Take care of him. Make sure you're the first person he sees when he wakes up."

"Oh... I see!" He smiled. "Thank you!" He started for the stairs. She caught his sleeve.

"Before you go... Could you take these ward collars off me and Eclipse?"

"Oh. Right." He grinned. "Sorry."

Shortly after, they were wandering through the halls.

"How... um... How do we... get out?" Shadow asked, glancing around. "We were blindfolded on the way in..."

"Hiei and I weren't," Kurama reminded.

"Oh yeah. So... like, what is this place, anyways? It's like a castle."

"It's a very well decorated _cave_," the fox said. "This is all underground. It looked like it was built into the side of a hill. And I severely doubt Karasu did it."

"Fucking sweet," Shadow said. "No wonder I didn't know there was a castle in England an hour's drive away from my house..."

_**

* * *

**_

Hiei and Shadow shared the back seat of Kurama's car with Kokuei on their way home. The dog had flatly refused to sit between them, so they ended up beside each other since Eclipse refused to vacate the front passenger seat. Hiei hadn't spoken a word to Shadow since the dungeon, and it had been obvious he was thinking.

"Turn on the radio, will you, Kurama? It's too damn quiet," Shadow requested after only a few minutes in the car. He did, and fiddled around for a few minutes until he found a suitable station (as in, one that actually felt like playing music instead of commercials at one in the morning).

Hiei finally got sick of Shadow's quiet. His lips pressed against hers, and her eyes widened. But before she could return the tender kiss, he pulled away.

"Hiei..." she murmured, surprised.

"I don't hate you," he said quietly, so only she could hear him.

"You don't!"

"No. But we do need to talk."

"So let's talk," she whispered. He moved closer and put his hand on her thigh, his eyes locked downwards as he thought of the right thing to say.

"I have to be able to trust you, Shadow..."

"You can!"

"You were kissing Karasu while he was holding you hostage!"

"I only wanted to distract him from Kurama. He had to feel like he could trust me. I only kissed him a couple times. He _wanted_ sex, at first."

"It's good you didn't have sex with him. I would have left you so fast..."

"Hiei, I will never have sex with another living creature without your permission. Unless, of course, you break up with me. Then I'll go screw anyone that stands still long enough."

"I'm not going to break up with you unless you start cheating on me."

"Well I told you you can trust me. I'll never be disloyal to you again."

He chuckled and kissed her lips again. "Don't make promises you can't keep."

Her jaw dropped and she gaped at him.

"And close your mouth before I shove something in it."

"What do you mean 'Don't make promises you can't keep'! I can keep that!"

"Koi, I was giving your _permission_ to keep acting like you do," he said.

"What, like a whore?"

"If that's how you want to word it." He sighed. "Shadow, I understand you never mean anything by playing around with other guys like you do. You never do it without reason. Never just because I'm not good enough and you want more than I put out. You do it because that's how you _are_. And I love how you are. I don't want to change you."

"Oh, Hiei! That's like, the most sensitive and profound thing I've ever heard a non-fictional guy _say_!" She started to kiss him, but he pulled away.

"It better never go beyond kissing and touching. Touching while _clothed."_

"I know. No sexual stuff. Koishii, I'd never do that _anyway!_ I have no desire or need to be sexual with anyone but you. And nobody but you is worthy of me being sexual with them anyways."

He smiled. "I missed you."

"I missed you too. I love you."

Hiei's lips sealed over hers and he kissed her passionately, his tongue reaquainting itself with all the surfaces he hadn't felt for days. She hungrily accepted the contact, his hands on her, the sensations pounding through her body.

Even though they both consciously tried to keep themselves quiet while they made up for time apart, Kurama just happened to glance at the rearview mirror to check on them. He smiled.

"Well, they made up," he told Eclipse casually. She glanced at him, then started a sentence as she turned around.

"How do you--HOLY SWEET JESUS IN CHOCOLATE SAUCE!" She spun around and faced forward, gripping the sides of her seat. "Do they HAVE to do that!"

"Why are you complaining?" Kurama asked quietly. "I was planning on doing the same thing to you once we get home."

"Oh. Ohhhh..." She melted into a puddle on her seat. "Drive _faster..._"

"Hiei, sex is for home," the fox said, aiming it towards the back of the car. "To be honest, it _is_ a little disturbing to have you two on the verge of ripping off each others' clothes in the back of my car."

Kokuei glanced at them, then dropped her head and glowered at them out of the corner of her eye. When they broke for breath, she got up and started pawing at Hiei. He buried his face in Shadow's neck, arms around her.

"Make the dog stop..."

"Kokuei..." Shadow whined. The dog stopped and glared at her. The girl sat up straighter and looked at the dog angrily. "No! Make up your mind! I'm sitting with him!"

The dog's head sank and she glowered up at Shadow.

"Fine. We'll wait 'til we're home. But you'd better steer clear of the bedroom, cuz I've got a lot of forgiveness to beg for."

Hiei chuckled at her words. "Love you."

"Love you too."

And so, both couples and the dog made it to their own respective homes safely. Actually, Eclispe went to Kurama's house since his mother had conveniently gone to visit relatives again. Conveniently.

As for Karasu... He woke up several days later severely weakened, as Kurama had predicted, and refused to leave the underground fortress thingy and show his face to Kurama because he was mad at him for betraying him. The crow seemed to think Kurama _cared_ if he showed his face.

And so... This severely short fic ends without a sixth, epilogue-ish, chapter... And for the Reikai Tantei (and Karasu, and Shadow, and Eclipse, and Kokuei, and Norman, and... need I go on?), life goes on as normal lives may, until I decide to put them through Hellish Doom again for my, and your, amusement.

THE END!

* * *

You all hate me for that kiss, don't you? _-snicker-_ I thought it was funny. And I liked the way I worked it out, too... so that he wasn't just kissing him for no reason, or just kissing him to give him what he wanted so he'd give Eclipse back... He was being a sneaky little bastard like he is... Yes... credit it all to my amazing storycrafting skills... _-glows with arrogance-  
_**I guess this is the place where I say you better not scream at me in reviews... Fire is my element, flames don't effect me.** :) Not that anything in this chapter was really flame-worthy, in my opinion. It's not like I killed anyone. Serious Anti-Karasu, Pro-Kurama fanatics might be a little more than appalled... But I'm Pro-Karasu, Pro-Kurama, Pro-Karasu-on-Kurama... So... That's what you get. Complaints will be laughed at. (Really, there's no point in complaining. It's written, it's posted, I like it, I'm not changing it). 


End file.
